Disney: “Lindsay Lohan’s Breasts Are Too Big”

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Big_melonsDisney must be out of their minds – they want to cover up Lindsay Lohan’s breasts.

Film executives are allegedly distraught at the size of the ubiquitous starlet’s curves and, according to the mighty Popbitch, have even spent millions on CGI effects to make them smaller in their latest film Herbie: Fully Loaded

Obviously, completely unaware of the concept of ‘something for the dads’, the assembled suits have come to the conclusion that ‘Lindsay’s breasts were too big and some necklines were too low’.

It’s worth pointing out, of course, that this is all just speculative hearsay – for the moment.

Rumour has it that a DVD of ‘before and after’ scene comparisons is doing the rounds among special effects boffins (probably excited now that they can claim to have genuinely ‘touched a girl up’ for the first time in their lives).

Should a major newspaper offer serious cash for this ‘mountains to molehills‘ compilation, then the truth will surely be revealed. Until then? Maybe we could all ask gurning sugar-daddy Bruce Willis (DVDs) to do a quick visual comparison.

Assuming his heart doesn’t give out, that is.

[story by C J Davies]


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Comments

  1. Marco fernandez says

    U stupid disney bitch leave her tities alone!!!!! faggots suck my dick my name is marco fernandez

  2. Anonymous says

    leave lindsey alone… she’s lucky enough to have boobs, so let them be SEEN!!!

  3. SORRY PARIS says

    i feel soo sorry for nicole richie an di think that pasris is sooo horrible but ever since shes done that to nicole i hate her Irealli used to like her and them the same but now i like nicole richie sooo much more and all i gave to say is ill pray for you and carry on doing your thang dont let paris and her new UGLY friend put you down COZ KIMBERLY STEWART aint worth the bother and we all no that you would be soooo much better on the simple life beacuse you and paris made it what it is but oh well its her lose hunni not urs KEEP SAFE GOD BLESS!!!!

  4. SORRY PARIS says

    i feel soo sorry for nicole richie an di think that pasris is sooo horrible but ever since shes done that to nicole i hate her Irealli used to like her and them the same but now i like nicole richie sooo much more and all i gave to say is ill pray for you and carry on doing your thang dont let paris and her new UGLY friend put you down COZ KIMBERLY STEWART aint worth the bother and we all no that you would be soooo much better on the simple life beacuse you and paris made it what it is but oh well its her lose hunni not urs KEEP SAFE GOD BLESS!!!!

  5. Newo says

    You can tell just what kind of losers have posted many of the comments here. Just look at their worthless spelling, poor capitalization and hideous grammar.

    Yes, I must agree that Ms. Lohan is nicely endowed in the mammary region of her physique, but sheesh, if that is all you have time for, get a life, babies!

  6. says

    Do not mock other people’s grammar,
    they’re not in school anymore so BACK OFF!!
    Besides you’re pretty sad if you are up at 1am in the morning
    Good boy

  7. Matt says

    “You’re pretty sad if you’re up at 1 am in the morning”
    You’re pretty imaginitive if you’re up at 6am in the afternoon.

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