Dear 20-Something Backup Dancers- JLo Is Single Again

Casper Smart Jennifer LopezJennifer Lopez has been dating her boy toy, Casper Smart, for a couple years.  Since the beginning, there were a lot of gay rumors surrounding Smart, both because he’s a dancer with well manicured eye brows and because his ass spent a lot of time in clubs where men wear glitter and g-strings.  But JLo laughed off the rumors, and went on with her Madonna-esq move.

But after 2 and a half years together, they have finally called it quits.  Wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that Casper has been caught texting a couple of transsexuals lately (of course it does).

After dating a guy who likes guns in the club, a guy who likes topless girls on poles, and a guy who looks like he lives off the blood and souls out of young virgins, Jennifer Lopez decided to change it up and start dating a much younger guy with nothing to offer but a tight ass and barely dropped balls.  Jennifer was 42 at the time, and Casper Smith was a 24 year old backup dancer, who suddenly went from the dollar menu at McDonalds to being a pretty famous kept man with a nice weekly allowance.  Sounds just like love, right?

There were a lot of whispers about Smart’s gender preference, especially since there were quite a few stories of Casper getting down in the best gay bars that Greenwich Village has to offer.  But the two laughed off the rumors, and Smart got an extra few Benjamins in his paycheck for following Lopez around everywhere like a love sick puppy.

Fast forward to these last few weeks, and BAM.  Someone (Casper) got a little sloppy with their on the side activities, and suddenly there were pictures popping up all over the Interwebz of Smart messaging transsexuals in all sorts of sexual ways.  Now these girls are hot, so I can see why he went after them, but as any much younger boy toy of a celebrity knows, you never EVER get caught creeping around.  That’s just unacceptable and will pretty quickly end with you losing your comfy gig.

For a few days, neither JLo or Smart responded to the leaked sexts, but now they have confirmed they’re broken up.  In true celebrity damage control, there are “anonymous sources” who are claiming they have actually been over for about 2 months, so “technically” Casper was a single man when he started trolling Instagram for titties and dicks.  Well, just for titties, since the anonymous sources are also claiming Casper never knew these ladies were carrying twigs and berries in their bodycon dresses.  Suuuuuuuuuure he didn’t know that.  These girls didn’t throw a bunch of “shemale” and “tranny” hashtags all over their pictures or anything (side note- they totally did).  The sources say that these two broke up over other reasons, and not at all because JLo lets NO MAN make her look like a fool except every guy she dates.

Lopez is on tour for her latest terrible album, so Casper has been slowly moving his shit out of her gigantic mansion and into his new luxurious 50 square foot studio apartment that will be paid for by his severance check. Jennifer was also smart enough to make Smart sign a non-disclosure, so sadly, the likelihood of us getting some good dirt on all of her diva actions seems slim.

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