OK, so that headline is a lie – yes, a pair of David & Victoria Beckham waxworks have been unveiled at Madame Tussauds in New York, but any Americans who go wild over some wax shaped like a Spice Girl and her husband deserve a shoeing.
To mark the official end of David Beckham's competitive football career and the start of a new career as a highly-paid performing monkey for the Los Angeles Galaxy football team, the New York branch of Madame Tussauds has set up a brand-new 'Welcome To America' exhibit featuring George W Bush greeting David Beckham and his wife Victoria. Since they're just a couple of sculpted blobs of wax it's difficult to gauge public opinion of the David & Victoria Beckham waxworks, although common consensus says that the David Beckham waxwork is three times more intelligent than its real-life counterpart, and Victoria Beckham's waxy tits don't look nearly fake enough.
Madame Tussauds in New York is becoming alarmingly fast in reacting to news. Last year it created a Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt waxwork before any pictures of her had been seen in public and it also wanted to stage a waxy Brad Pitt/ Angelina Jolie wedding until the grumpy stars demanded that they didn't. And now there are brand new David and Victoria Beckham waxworks in place, shortly after it was announced that David Beckham was moving to LA. With a zippy work ethic like that, we can expect the Dakota Fanning Rape waxwork exhibit to be unveiled by sundown.
Forget everything that's happened to David Beckham in the last few weeks – the million dollar per week contract, the phonecalls to Tom Cruise, the Maddox Jolie training, the offers to buy Michael Jackson's house, the premature Scientology denouncing – nothing has announced David and Victoria Beckham's arrival in America more than a couple of bits of wax that sort of look a bit like them standing in a big room, as ITV reports:
Madame Tussauds in New York unveiled the celebrity couple to the sound of Neil Diamond's America, in honour of their upcoming move to Los Angeles, where David has signed a five-year contract with LA Galaxy. Draped in stars and stripes, the Beckhams were joined by a wax figure of President Bush holding a sign reading: "Welcome to America." The figures have been imported from Madame Tussauds in London and will remain on display in New York for two weeks. The couple stand arm in arm, with David dressed in a black tuxedo and Victoria wearing a sparkling pale green evening gown.
And these are special interactive waxworks of David and Victoria Beckham, too – visitors to Madame Tussauds are encouraged to walk right up to the waxworks to touch them, kiss them, take photos of them and loudly ask strangers "Excuse me, is this man famous? I think the woman is Kylie Minogue or something, but I don't recognise the guy. If he isn't famous, he really shouldn't be here" about them.
However, it has to be said that the David and Victoria Beckham waxworks have fitted into Madame Tussauds remarkably well. Already, for instance, the Rebecca Loos waxwork has had to be moved further away because the David Beckham waxwork was sending it filthy text messages.