Here at hecklerspray we live life by a handful of important rules. Rule number one is that magic is shit and magicians are arseholes. But occasionally something will happen that changes our mind.
Most recently, uber-magician and smuggest man in the universe David Copperfield has been confounding our expectations, by bamboozling a gaggle of would-be thieves with a brief display of his incredible magical skills. Whether or not this involved David Copperfield dicking about on a wire pretending he could fly is unknown.
Magic is a pretty useless activity. Watching a smug man confuse a stupid yokel by showing him a playing card isn't fun, it's stupid. Magic is so rubbish that even tigers are tearing out magicians' throats these day. And we're not even getting started on David Blaine. In fact, the only good thing to come out of magic – as far as we can see – is reading Paul Daniels' online diary as he tries to explain Durham to his fans.
But now all that has changed, because David Copperfield has done something incredible. Something so amazing that words can't even explain it. Oh, wait, yes they can: David Copperfield faked out a bunch of teenage robbers by using magic on them. According to E! Online, David Copperfield was mooching about Palm Beach with a couple of girls on Sunday, when a gang of hoodlums with guns approached him and ordered him to hand over everything he had.
But this wasn't any old crime victim, this was David Copperfield – who quickly used magical sleight-of-hand techniques to show the robbers that he wasn't carrying anything on his person, even though he now admits to possessing a large amount of cash. Amazing! Magic, 1 – Robbers, 0.
Obviously, David Copperfield's magical turn was slightly compromised after his frightened female companions quickly gave the robbers everything they had, including fistfuls of US dollars and Euros, their cell-phones, all kinds of keys, some plane tickets and David Copperfield's passport. Which sort of dilutes the whole amazingness of the story, we suppose.
However, the story has a happy ending; the crooks were all caught within minutes of the robbery, and David Copperfield celebrated by pulling an unusually long piece of string out of someone's pocket. Or something equally tiresome.
Read more:
Copperfield Works Magic On Bad Guys – E! Online
[story by Stuart Heritage]