Proud Englishman and former England captain, David Beckham, wants to become a U.S. citizen. If you listen very carefully, you can just about hear the disappointment emanating drifting over the ocean.
That’s right America! You can put up with his silly, squeaky voice from now on and we’ll all chortle as his voice becomes Americanised, replacing ‘rubbish’ for ‘trash’, dropping the odd ‘U’ from words and spelling ‘defence’ the American way – A.T.T.A.C.K.
And better yet, you’ll get to keep his wife Victoria all for yourselves.
The footballer… sorry… soccer star and Posh Spice (yes, we’re still calling her that because she hasn’t really done much since her Spice Girls days, other than simply exist in a variety of expensive clothes) moved to Los Angeles with their three sons in 2007 when he signed up to play for L.A. Galaxy for so much money that it guaranteed his team mates hated him on sight.
And now, Beckham wants to stay in the States so his children can finish their education there. They’ll be experts in Creationism before you now it!
Of course, ol’ Davey Boy wants to reiterate that despite wanting to sever ties with England, he’ll always be an Englishman. Just one who prefers to be officially ‘American’.
When asked if he would consider U.S. citizenship, he told the Los Angeles Times
“I hope so, one day. It would be nice. I’m English born and bred. And that’s the way I’ll always be. I’m an Englishman, you know…
“Our boys go to school here. They’re happy here. As long as they continue to be happy here, my wife’s happy here, then we plan on staying.”
So there you have it. Let a reverse tug o’war proceed where both parties insist that the other takes the spoils.