From the monthly archives:

December 2005

Paris Hilton Shuns Reputation, Buys Some Dogs

by Stuart Heritage

Of all the celebrities you can think of, Paris Hilton is the worst at looking after dogs. This isn’t opinion – it’s fact, according to readers of American dog-related magazines. But Paris Hilton doesn’t care. Paris Hilton is Rock And Roll. If someone tells Paris Hilton that she’s rubbish at being a dog owner, Paris [...]

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Notorious B.I.G Duets Party Goes Bangy Bang Stabby Stab

by Stuart Heritage

Notorious B.I.G has been dead for eight years, but that hasn’t stopped trouble from blowing up wherever his name is mentioned. Something as genteel as a Notorious B.I.G album launch party ended in mayhem early on Wednesday morning, with three people getting stabbed and another three getting shot. This is disorder on a scale we [...]

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Sugababes Show Off Mutya Replacement

by Stuart Heritage

Only yesterday, The Sugababes announced that Mutya Buena had left the group after seven beautiful years of looking all grumpy in photos and mumbling answers in interviews. It took all of a day to find a replacement for Mutya. And the brand new Sugababe – Amelle Berrabah – seems to fit the Sugababes bill perfectly: [...]

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Letterman Accidentally Torments Lady Via Sexy Eyebrow Positions

by Shawn Lindseth

A stalker can be dangerous. Countless stars have encountered them either in court or out, from boring CNN hosts to the action packed likes of Mel ‘I’m deeply religious now’ Gibson. The court-ordered restrainer can be a God send in such cases. That’s why celebs get them, often three times a week. But what happens [...]

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Renee Zellweger And Kenny Chesney – Officially Solo

by Stuart Heritage

The marriage of Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney was kind of perfect – they met in January, married in May, split in September and are back being officially single again in December. A courtship, marriage and messy annulment all in the space of one short year – it’s this attention to turbo-charged efficiency and staggeringly [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Christmas Time

by 586 MEDIA

Cliff Richard once sang "Christmas time/Mistletoe and wine." But while Cliff may have used Christmas time to get boozed up and snog women, Santa has a much more difficult Christmas. Christmas time for Santa involves flying around on his sleigh throwing presents through people’s roofs and at giant polar bears. And it’d be easy for [...]

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Christmas Number One – No Odds, Shayne’s Done It

by Stuart Heritage

Normally at this point in the day, we’d provide you with a set of blazingly accurate Christmas Number One betting odds. Not today, though. Shayne Ward’s pretty much got it all sewn up, you see. In face, Shayne Ward’s version of That’s My Goal is so certain of getting the 2005 UK Christmas Number One [...]

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Watch The Dirtiest Card Trick In The World

by 586 MEDIA

Card tricks are OK, but they’re usually only done by timid boys who think that they can mask their desperate lack of a personality by flicking cards around and talking quickly. Card tricks with dirty language, though, are a completely different story. You may remember a few months ago we showed a clip of the [...]

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2006 Music Betting Odds – Posh, England, Andre…

by Stuart Heritage

Lots of things are going to happen in 2006: England will go out in the World Cup semis, the Gulf Stream system will shut down and we’ll all freeze to death, and some people will get number one records. But who? It’s time to take a look at a few more 2006 music betting odds [...]

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Sharon Osbourne Shrinks Her Knockers Down For Christmas

by Stuart Heritage

Sharon Osbourne is having trouble with her boobs. No, not Chico and Andy from X Factor – her real breasts. Sharon doesn’t like them anymore, so she’s going to make them smaller. Which is all well and good – after all, it’s a woman’s prerogative to be able to change her body however she wants [...]

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