What we are raving about and what we are crying over.

Folded:

• Rambo 4 (I see dead people)

• James (imagine if you had all this lot in one room, put them all on chairs then invited your mates round for a beer. It’ll certainly get you out of any further Best Man duties)

• Jennifer Rafferty (find this talented lady a more interesting/less commercial sound)

• Mother’s Day (got one? Buy her something nice. She’s dead? Buy her some flowers)

• Vintage ‘Nostalgia Collection’ Action Man (why don’t you grow up? No, we’re fine, thanks)

Creased:

• Russell Brand nude (nobody needs it and, as far as we are aware, nobody has asked for it either)

• Tesco garlic and herb ready-cooked chicken (smells nice in the shop. Get one home and it tastes like stomach lining)

• Delicate universal remotes (ok, unless you breathe on them – then they reset for the tenth time and you explode)

• Juno original soundtrack (worse than a student union poetry reading)

• Oscar 2008 (No Country For Old Men is a great movie, but an Academy Award for adapting the screenplay to be almost exactly the same as the book? No, it should have gone to The Diving Bell And The Butterfly)