Robin of Sherwood won a BAFTA.

Folded:

• World of Spectrum.org (download classic Speccy games like Target Renegade, Joe Blade and The Great Escape. Sell your Playstation 3)

• Facebook (a great way to wean yourself off smoking)

• Chocolate and Toffee Crisp Bites from Sainsbury (No longer lethal apparently. Sweet, sickly, £1.99 and well worth having the shakes for)

• Jordan (muck, but oddly likeable sometimes. Boom, puff – credibility gone)

• That new Big Brother diary room chair (for the gay Emperor in you)

Creased:

• Cooking Mama on Wii (imagine drowning yourself in a bowl of soapy water. It’d be more fun than playing this nonsense. C’mon Wii people, sort it out)

• Facebook (a great way to throw yourself out the window)

• BT adverts (they’re all crap, but the ones with that miserable cow who wants her bloke to piss off just so she can sit in her sweatpants and watch Fargo is the worst. Dump her, mate. Find someone your own age and without two equally miserable kids)

• Peter Andre (still not getting the joke)

• The Big Brother house itself (is there anything left in Ikea for the producers to buy?)