I’ll have you, you, you… aaaaannd you.

Folded:

• Point Break on Five last week (“Go back to the valley, man!” Ah, it’s been too long. Too long)

• Empire Thunderdome (it’s still fun, so go and vote for your favourite domer. Any ideas who you’ll go for..?)

• 300 (Spartans fucking rule)

• M&S possibly buying Sainsbury (why should you care? Because it will give you somewhere else to shop besides Tesco in ten years time)

• Old Jackass on TMF (you can forget how funny it used to be. This’ll remind you)

Creased:

• ‘Scripted’ Top Gear (it’s still great, but some of the features feel overly staged)

• Empire Thunderdome (bloody thing)

• Saw III on DVD (apparently not a parody. We read the box three times over)

• Pizza Hut’s lunchtime buffet offer (that is not on at weekends. So is a complete waste of time for most of us)

• The police (not the group, the pain-in-the-ass coppers who won’t go anywhere near an estate full of fist-happy teenagers, but will happily pull us over twice for running a ‘red’ [read: amber] light in one week)