Stand up, sit down. Creased, Folded.

Folded:

• Kate Nash: Caroline’s a Victim (not really indicative of her other work, but an assured way in for the skinny jeans crowd)

• Soul Britannia (a decent series that finished last week on BBC4. Well worth catching on the inevitable repeat)

• E4 Music back on the mornin’ box (no more shots of Jo O’Meara sleeping. We’ve kept our cereal down for over two weeks now)

• A half (might just be the way to go. Not as geezer/govnor looking as a pint, plus you can drink it at an easier pace; for there’s no fear it’ll get all warm and gross in your sweaty palms before it’s down the gullet)

• M.A.S.K (the best cartoon theme tune ever? Maybe Cities of Gold? Maybe Dogtanian? Listen on YouTube and make up your own mind)

Creased:

• Girlie mags (no, not those, perv, the bastard celebrity ones. They get everywhere and you can’t help but pick them up to read on the crapper. We weren’t even sure Emmerdale was still going)

• Prison Break 2 on Five (slowly does it. Too slowly)

• A pint (unless you’re still a teenager, these bad boys cling to your gut like lard fajitas. Who gives a damn? Women, pal. Women)

• Joss Stone (the Devonshire Yank and her Devonshire Yank accent is nestling on just about everyone’s tits at the moment)

• Pancake Day [link NSFW and frankly terrifying] (pancakes are nice, so why only eat them once a year? What about Anchovy Day instead? That makes far more sense)