Christmas cheer and bah, humbug.

Folded:

• Batman Arkham Asylum 2 teaser trailer (already?! You betcha)
• Merry Christmas! (there’s only a week left and this feature won’t be published then. We’ll be busy, you see. Eating)
• Complaining (it WILL get you vouchers, we promise)
• Avatar (pretty good, a saggy middle though like Terminator 2)
• Simon Cowell (X Factor’s only real winner. His teeth are like lanterns)
• Killing in the Name by Rage Against the Machine (it’s a crap song really, but it has to be Number One)

Creased:

• JLS on Xtra Factor (one was wearing a t-shirt with claw marks in it, another had stretched the neck of his so much he had cleavage, a third looked like one of The London Boys)
• Merry Christmas (we’re sill too damn early. Go on; tell to us to naff off)
• Christmas markets (try traditional German cuisine served to you by someone from Hull. They don’t even bother with an accent)
• Just for us meat eaters over the festive period… (THIS would make even Desperate Dan feel miserable)
• The Climb by Joe McElderry (a guy not surprised to be on this list we’re sure)