It’s hard not to feel sorry for Janet Jackson sometimes. She’s recorded countless classic songs like, er… anyway, look, the thing that Janet Jackson is now most famous for is whipping a nork out at a sports match.

And no woman wants to have their music career – which has spanned two decades – spoiled by the sight of a floppy tit, do they? So there’s only one way to get everyone’s mind focused back on the music, and that’s by doing lots of audience-friendly marketing. Like, say, letting fans design the cover of the new Janet Janet 20 Years Old CD. Yeah, that should do it.