Courtney Love Gets Probation Waived, Eyes Leak Strange Tear-Like Liquid

Courtney Love is a cry-baby.

Just because some judge took pity on her and waived away her multi-year
probation with a bang of his wooden hammer, and then dropped three
misdemeanor cases against her, she breaks down and starts crying like an
Asian toddler well into his second shoe factory shift. What was
Courtney Love afraid of anyway? Prison?

Like going to jail would be that tough anyway, right? Having watched
three separate episodes of Oz in two sittings, hecklerspray
firmly believes that we have what it take to thrive in a prison-type
setting. We know how to make cigarettes out of bathroom grime and
green-bean can wrappers, and we even have a
top-dog game plan should any world
governments ever catch on to our…

…actually, let's just skip to Love's story.

Courtney Judith Love's middle name is not Judith, but that hasn't stopped her
from being tangled in the US legal system seemingly since an hour or
two after her parent's reproductive parts were cordially introduced.
She's had a pretty long and public history with drug and alcohol abuse.
The alcohol was an easy fix for her, as Mel Gibson reached into that dark hole and pulled her out -
according to Love.

The drug habit though, well that hasn't been so easy. In fact, until the
judge waived his magic gavel, Love had three misdemeanor charges
weighing against her. Two were drug related, and one, we're told, was
for attacking some lady that was sleeping on a couch. Love said of her
dropped probation: 

"Thank you for not taking me into custody. Thank you for
giving me an opportunity. You've been a good, fair judge. Sorry for
crying."

The Judge, in turn, said to Love:

"Early on in this case Ms. Love, I think you came very
close to coming into custody. I think you've done very well. You've
shown to me you are interested in a much less destructive lifestyle. I
would like to cautiously wish you the best in this matter."

After which the judge slipped her a cassette tape and said 'check out my band'.
Well the cassette thing never happened. The judge never said that. Keep your
gavel to yourself, your honor. 

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Courtney Love's Second Chance - Monsters & Critics