You know how in the end of The Passion Of The Christ, Jesus resurrected and ascended into heaven? Well that was Benedict Fitzgerald's brilliant plot-twist idea – and now Mel Gibson won't even pay him for it.

A seasoned vet like Gibson should know you can't burn bridges like that – what'll happen in Lethal Weapon 5 when Martin Riggs is in a bad spot, and Gibson needs a writer to think of a way out – like turning water into wine to distract his enemies. Or maybe multiplying fish to help a young blind boy learn math, and then he finds out the blind boy is his enemy's only son. Or maybe Riggs could learn that before birth he'd been genetically altered to fly by Germans.

We work cheap, Mr. Gibson.

Anyhow, writer Fitzgerald feels like he needs a bigger cut of the Jesus proceeds, and he's suing Gibson to get it. After all, he sat side by side with Mel for months on end imagining the story up and then telling it to people for the first time ever.

If heaven has a courtroom, we imagine Peter, James and John are all sitting up there in the litigant box just waiting for Mel Gibson to die and resurrect into the defendant's booth. He plagiarised the hell out of them, after all, and they probably feel they deserve a Passion cut. Keep in mind heaven has a real estate market that'll make your wallet thin and bloat with anxiety – 800 square foot townhouses go for like $280,000!

Once Mel makes it to heaven the powers that be will probably take a couple of things into account. Things like, for example, Mel possibly hating all Jews that have ever lived. That won't look good. On the other hand they may also look at how he got Courtney Love sober all by himself without some fancy-pants Scientology how-to guidebook. On the third hand heaven might ask him why he made Braveheart end so sad. Remember how sad it was? Anybody?

But all those issues can wait – because Gibson's still got heavy temporal issues to deal with. Issues like his co-writer of The Passion of the Christ suing the bejeezes out of him because said writer feels short changed. Benedict Fitzgerald, who we heard previously thought everyone on-set was getting paid in hugs from old Italian women, wants five million actual dollars. Probably because his original compensation doesn't translate well into Euros. As his lawsuit delicately puts it:

“Gibson preyed monetarily on Ben, taking advantage of his unbridled enthusiasm for the project and with full cognizance of Ben's fundamental personal and spiritual beliefs.”

Fitzy's suit goes on to say that not only did his bank account get mostly skipped, but Gibson's got stuffed with money even when he'd previously said his morals prevented him from profiting from a Jesus movie. Which he certainly did – enough to buy 40 people and an island anyway.

Is it possible what Fitzgerald is looking for here is a peninsula on Gibson Island? Possibly. Is he gonna get it? Possibly again.

Read More:

Gibson Sued Over Passion Payments – BBC