Probably the last taboo of motherhood is admitting that you feel affection towards your baby, because it’s crass and almost definitely a lie.

But Christina Aguilera is all about shattering taboos – she shattered the one about not honking like a wounded moose in songs for starters – and that’s why Christina Aguilera has just made history as the first woman ever to publicly say that she actually enjoys spending time with her baby. Of course, Christina Aguilera’s comments happen to neatly tie in with the launch of her new fragrance, so there’s every chance she was just being deliberately controversial to stoke up sales.

Incidentally, we heard that the new Christina Aguilera perfume is inspired by her first few months of motherhood, which is why it smells like a mixture of yellow poo and her own tears.

Being a new mother is supremely hard work. You’ve got to hire staff to look after the baby, tell the staff to be quiet because you’ve got a hangover, keep updating the staff’s photo of yourself so the baby doesn’t forget what you look like… it’s one long nightmare, and sometimes the only thing that’ll keep you going is the thought that one day you can pack the baby off to boarding school and pretend it was never even born.

Unless you’re Christina Aguilera, of course, in which case you inexplicably turn into the baby’s biggest cheerleader the instant it shoots out of your vajuju.

The rest of the world may have a profound indifference to Christina Aguilera’s baby Max Liron – it rolled its eyes when she announced the pregnancy, shrugged when she gave the baby a stupid name and it recoiled when she put it on the cover of a magazine – but that hasn’t stopped Christina Aguilera from banging on and on about the sodding thing to every single person she meets. It’s almost as if she’s proud of it. Urgh. People reports:

“[He is] amazing, incredible,” the singer, 27, tells Entertainment Tonight. “He just lights up my whole world every day with his laughs and his smiles.” She reveals that Max has started crawling and is cutting his first teeth. “He’s a mover and shaker. He’s just a smiley, happy guy. I really lucked out,” Aguilera tells USA Today.

Lucked out? Hardly, Christina – everyone knows that the most lucrative aspect of being a celebrity mother is the post-partum depression. Do you know how much money people get for writing books where they say they wanted to throw their babies against a brick wall? Shitloads of money, that’s how much. And you’re not going to see a penny of it now, all because you actually happen to like your own son.

And it’s not like you went and adopted the baby from a developing country, either, so you can’t even go and make a heartfelt documentary about what a good person you are, either. And you say you’re happy, Christina? Really? A likely story. Excuse us for not believing you.