Divorce isn't fun. The tearing apart of the sacred marriage bond is an especially painful process that leaves both parties lost, hurt and confused. Unless a supermodel's husband runs off with a girl from a toy shop. Then it's kinda fun.
The Christie Brinkley/ Peter Cook divorce has turned from an obscure story about some woman who used to be quite famous splitting up with a man who draws pictures of houses all day. That was until Diana Bianchi came into the equation – she's the 19-year-old girl who apparently had it off with Peter Cook until Christie Brinkley asked for a divorce. Now the Christie Brinkley/ Peter Cook divorce is a genuine scandal, starring a broken former supermodel, the world's most evil architect and a sly Lolita. And, unsurprisingly, Diana Bianchi has been blabbing her gob off about the whole shebang.
If Christie Brinkley carries on her tremendous rate of being a bit shit at staying married, she'll start having her own Henry VIII-style rhymes about how her husbands disappeared. However, instead of 'divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived', the Christie Brinkley rhyme will go 'divorced, divorced, divorced, divorced,' which isn't quite as catchy.
For about two or three nanoseconds, nobody really knew why Christie Brinkley was divorcing Peter Cook, her fourth husband. And then things started to get juicy – it's alleged that Peter Cook was having it off with Diana Bianchi, a 19-year-old who he met at a toystore before letting him 'work at his office', if you know what we mean. We mean it sounds like she had sex with him a bunch of times.
It didn't take too long for Diana Bianchi to jab her oar in and get her side of the Christie Brinkley/ Peter Cook divorce story across, either – Bianchi gave an interview to ET Online where, oddly enough, she paints herself as a young, naive girl confused by the lure of an evil sex hunter, even though in this country she'd be old enough to vote, drive, get drunk in a pub, smoke fags and have it off with anyone she wanted to. Here's what Diane Bianchi told ET Online:
"He'd make advances verbally towards me first, and I guess it just, you know, escalated into something that I didn't really expect. I knew he was married; I mean, there were pictures of his family in his office everywhere… I never expected that he would take it to a different level, even though I had people in my ear telling me different. I guess I'm always a little too trusting sometimes… He didn't say he was going to leave [Brinkley], he just basically left it at, like he wished things were different. He wished that, you know, he was younger, or he had met me at a different time. He never promised that he would leave her. I never asked him to leave her for me; I never was in it for that – I didn't have any kind of intentions like that."
Then, when asked why she decided to allegedly give Christie Brinkley's husband a right old seeing too, Diana Bianchi's lawyer steps in with this piece of flawless lawyerspeak:
"I don't think she's in the position to answer that. I don't think she was in the position to answer it when she was 18 years old, initially 17 years old, when she met him, and I think that's the reason we are where we're at. I mean, I think he preyed on her vulnerability, her naiveté, her age, her immaturity, the fact that she is trusting, the fact that – and the law really focuses on this level of the relationship – the fact that he became her employer before he started making these advances."
What's more, there are rumours that some more women who Peter Cook cheated with Christie Brinkley on are beginning to come out of the woodwork, so it looks like this scandal is nowhere near finished yet. We tell you, Christie Brinkley should have never split up with Billy Joel, who's thought to be writing his new single I Wouldn't Have Fucked A 19-Year-Old Behind Your Back (Like That Special Architect Dude).
[story by Stuart Heritage]