Shocking and saddening news out of New Zealand this week – there is one situation that Chris Pine’s blue eyes can’t get him out of.
It’s like finding out that Santa Claus isn’t real all over again. Captain Kirk 2.0 got pulled over after driving through a sobriety checkpoint at the start of the month looking a little merrier than legally allowed by the country of New Zealand. It doesn’t matter how chiseled your jaw is, kids, drink driving is neither cool nor clever.
Chris was in New Zealand filming his new movie, Z For Zachariah – which according to imdb, is about a sixteen year old girl that survives a nuclear war in a small American town. Maybe she crammed herself in to a 1950’s fridge à la that offensively bad Indiana Jones reboot.
Anyway, Chris was driving back from the wrap party for said movie with disgustingly beautiful girlfriend Iris Bjork Johannesdottir, when he caught the eye of a couple of police when driving through a sobriety checkpoint. That’s fair enough, they’re only human. Who would pass up the chance to bend Chris Pine over the hood of a car and give him a good frisk?
I accidentally typed ‘frick’ instead of ‘frisk’ the first time I wrote that sentence, and to be fair, the statement still stands.
He reportedly blew an 0.8, which is slap-bang on the limit for being legally drunk in NZ, and now he has to show his stunning face in court this Monday or an arrest warrant will be issued.
The owner of the Blue Pub, the bar responsible for getting him all boozed up said that Chris ‘seemed fine’ before he left at around 2.30 am, and was shocked to hear about the charge because the bar had reassured all the guests that sober drivers were available to haul them back to their hotels so they can pass out in safety of their own solid gold four poster beds.
Now we get to the part where you insert your own joke about piloting the starship Enterprise under the influence, preferably involving the phrase ‘A Klingon and a Vulcan walk in to a bar…’ *
*Not really. DUI’s are nothing to laugh about. We do have some standards on this site, you know.