Cheryl Cole is known for being in Girls Aloud, for marrying a rogue of a football player, and for more-often-than-not being fully dressed while in public. None of the above gives reason for anyone to take issue. Except for that wearing clothes lark. That’s a pain in the bum.

Not only does the singer/ TV presenter insist on conducting herself in a rather respectable manner, she’s now come out and said that she would not consider doing a nude photo shoot. Elaborating that she would consider it tacky.

Cheryl’s assertion that she would like to remain clothed as often as possible, even in the bath, seems odd. Especially since we just made that last bit up. Not least because her girl group are often onstage clad in what closely-resembles bondage gear. Oh well. We’re guessing S&M gear still technically counts as clothing.Very tight clothing that comes with a free tube of thrush medication.

We’re not all that uncomfortable with public nudity over here, nor are we adverse to talking in an over-familiar manner about celebrity body parts. The commentary is usually based around Robert Pattinson and other annoying/ often shirtless stars, but we are happy to broaden the net to include some fresh meat.

Cheryl is currently wowing people who are easily wowed, as co-host of the X-Factor. By ‘wowing’ we mean ‘astonishing’ people with her feats of not smacking Simon Cowell over the head with a wet fish every time he makes a pre-pubesctent crooner cry.

This success and others have clearly gone to the girl’s head. She now thinks she doesn’t have to bikini pictures/ boob shots to still further her career. We think that her being naked while on the show wouldn’t do much to improve the shows ratings but surely it can’t hurt. Crazy tone-deaf tweenagers will only boost ratings so far.

Difficult as ever, Cheryl states that even for the greater good, she is unwilling to pose nude for a lads’ magazine.

From Showbiz Spy:

The Girls Aloud star and X Factor judge thinks naked photo shoots are tacky. “There’s nothing tasteful about some fruit covering your bits!” she said. “Sometimes a beautiful dress is much more sexy than underwear. Have some class.”

This was a guest blog from Amy Grindhouse, who couldn’t be wonderful if she was made of golden sparkles…

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