Celebrity Haiku Competition: Radiohead

by C J Davies on December 10, 2007 13 Comments

Radiohead website downloads haikusYou know the score by now – hecklerspray presents a brief poetry-based diversion to brighten up your cripplingly dull Monday. Apart, of course, from those of you who now take this contest so seriously we're genuinely getting a little bit frightened.

This week we're asking you to scribble out lyrical odes to smilin' Thom Yorke and his pals in Radiohead. But – before we get onto that – let's take a look at last week's winner, shall we?

Last time around, we asked you to write haikus on the following topical celebrity story: that neurotic film-maker Woody Allen had been arguing so much with Spanish locals that he quit shooting his latest movie there. The winner was someone called sparkymike, whose effort ran thus:

Spain is reluctant
To forward its tax money
To wife adopters

Well done, sir.

Hold on – where are you going? There's plenty more fun to be had. Just because Mike was crowned the victor of last week's tussle, that doesn't mean you can't strive to be a champion right here and now. All you've got to do is come up with the best haiku on this tasty morsel:

Following the huge success of their 'In Rainbows' digital download, Radiohead are now closing the site in preparation for the CD/vinyl release.

Just remember the golden rule of haiku: five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables. So an example – based on this week's story – would run like this:

Thom and the band

decide to stop giving out

music for 'nothing'

Think you can do better? We'd be frankly astonished if you couldn't. Entries in the comments box below, please… 

Read More:

Radiohead To Close Website Downloads – Musicrooms

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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Joke Police December 10, 2007 at 11:31 am

Hecklerspray reader
gets angry; ‘Six syllables!’
he shouts. Innocence dies.

Reply

alexb December 10, 2007 at 12:55 pm

it’s december 10th
where is my f**ing discbox
you wonky bastards

Reply

Stabby McGee December 10, 2007 at 1:17 pm

Joke Police:

Ironic number of syllables in the last line, perhaps?

Reply

Joke Police December 10, 2007 at 4:03 pm

Clever man spots joke,
gloom lightens; anger ne’er shall
darken our doors again.

Reply

wambachumba December 10, 2007 at 4:20 pm

No-one wanted to
Pay money to Thom Yorke and
His wonky eyeball

Reply

euclid December 10, 2007 at 5:48 pm

In Rainbows’ makers:
“What could be better than free?”
Bigger pot of gold

Reply

gir December 10, 2007 at 5:58 pm

Joke Police are still
Investigating that last
Haiku; film at 10

Reply

sillyman December 10, 2007 at 9:49 pm

get your needle out
somethings under the rainbow
they brought vinyl back

Reply

sillyman December 10, 2007 at 9:55 pm

the postman is here
he brings me three new letters
and they are all red

Reply

sillyman December 10, 2007 at 10:06 pm

gold in the rainbow
hidden by pay what you want
wonky eye laughing

Reply

sillyman December 10, 2007 at 10:10 pm

closing down website
it is time to make paper
now pay what we ask

Reply

Christopher December 11, 2007 at 5:30 am

It’s Thom Yorkes eyeball!
Better paid than I am, thanks.
‘Wonky’ though it be!

Reply

Simon R. Gladdish June 9, 2011 at 11:41 am

Most rock stars are
Greedy selfish bastards and
I suspect that Thom is no exception.

Reply

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