Celebrity Haiku Competition: Crying Britney

by C J Davies on June 19, 2006 4 Comments

Haiku Britney Spears CryingHow hecklerspray smiled.

After a week in which our world-famous (look – just play along) Celebrity Haiku Competition ground to an entry-less halt, our last installment saw you all oozing poetry like a boil on Phillip Larkin's face.

The challenge was thus: write a Haiku about the rumours that Bryan Singer's portrayal of Superman makes him out to be a little bit less-than-heterosexual.

The winner was a reader by the name of Gestalt Trumpet, whose ditty ran something like this:

Superman sits and
Thinks about Lex Luthor and
Plays with his pee pee

Well done, 'Gestalt'. You're a winner.

Hang on a mo… wasn't last week's competition a Rollover Prize? Holy Christ – that means that TWO WHOLE TUBES of delicious Fruit Pastilles will be winging their way to the Trumpster. Send us your details, Gestalt (hecklerspray[AT]Gmail dot com), and we'll send you your tasty, tasty sweets.

And now for this week's Haiku challenge. Britney fans, take notice.

Fancy winning your very own tube of pastilles? Sure you do. All you have to do is write a Haiku about the following subject:

Britney Spears has strongly criticised staff in a New York diner for taking pictures of her while she was crying.

Just remember the golden rule of Haiku – five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables. What's that? Ye be wanting an 'example'? Oh, alright:

A Weeping Britney
Reaps Consequences Of Her
Attention-Grabbing

Oh, come on. You can do better than that.

Entries in the comments box, kids…

Read more:

Spears blasts waitresses for taking tearful snapshots – Yahoo

[story by C J Davies]

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

kurikuri June 19, 2006 at 6:07 pm

Brit Crying Haikus
*And* Disturbing Friday Funs?
Cry/Eat Fixation?

Reply

Matt Bregazzi June 22, 2006 at 10:35 am

Miss Britney Weeps And
Shys Away From The Snapper:
Fickle About Fame?

Reply

Maxwell March 28, 2007 at 10:20 pm

Say, like, so, you know -
Take my picture one more time
And I’ll have you waxed.

Reply

Simon R. Gladdish June 10, 2011 at 11:05 am

This is my second haiku
About Britney. She is welcome
To dry her tears on my undergarments.

Reply

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