Gather round kids, it’s time for a cautionary tale in the form of CeeLo Green. Poppin’ a molly isn’t big or clever, and if it’s popped in someone else’s drink without their permission, it’s also kind of a felony.
Cee Lo Green has been cleared of sexual assault this week after being accused of slipping ecstasy into a lady friend’s drink while they were eating at a sushi restaurant last year. She then reportedly woke up in his bed the morning after, wearing nothing but a frown as she tried to figure out how in the hell she ended up there. He’s not totally dodged the bullet, though.
The case was thrown out because of ‘insufficient evidence’ - the court seemed to think that the unnamed woman’s story had more holes in it than Swiss cheese. Cee Lo may got away scott free as far as the assault charge, but he isn’t completely home and dry. The Fuck You singer was booked on possession of ecstasy, which is definitely one of the worst outcomes of a sushi date you can think of.
Even though there’s no proof that he mixed up a Raver’s Special cocktail, the woman in question reportedly has a recording of Cee Lo – real name Thomas DeCarlo Calloway – talking about using the drug, which is apparently enough to convict him of furnishing ecstasy. Which is really just a fancy way of saying that he was sharing it.
As his attorney said outside the courthouse:
“We are pleased that the Los Angeles County District Attorney has completed its investigation and concluded that the evidence did not support the false and unfounded claims made over a year ago. As it relates to the one charge of furnishing or sharing ecstasy, Mr. Green will responsibly address that matter in a court of law.”
If he’s found guilty, everyone’s fourth favourite Voice coach will probably just get away with a slap on the wrist and be told to pick up some McDonalds wrappers on the side of a road somewhere, considering it’s his first time in trouble with the law.
Catch up Cee Lo, these days fame comes with a two prosecution minimum.