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What’s Jay Leno’s New Show? Why, It’s Jay Leno’s Old Show
In May, Jay Leno was due to retire from TV and spend his days droning witlessly about cars and getting chin massages. But that was never actually going to be the case. There's such a dearth of middle-aged male millionaires who aren't as funny as they think they are on TV right now that Jay Leno was never going to stay retired for long. And now we know what Jay Leno's next show will be - it's his old show, basically - on the same network, in the same studio and broadcast 90 minutes earlier so even more people can get contaminated by watch it.
In May, Jay Leno was due to retire from TV and spend his days droning witlessly about cars and getting chin massages. But that was never actually going to be the case. There's such a dearth of middle-aged male millionaires who aren't as funny as they think they are on TV right now that Jay Leno was never going to stay retired for long. And now we know what Jay Leno's next show will be - it's his old show, basically - on the same network, in the same studio and broadcast 90 minutes earlier so even more people can get contaminated by watch it.
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Lisa Snowdon
Strictly Come Dancing recap time, which makes a change - usually at this time of the morning we're... oh. Not a change at all, actually. There are just three dancers left on Strictly Come Dancing, and it's impossible to guess who'll win at the moment. Unless you guess that Rachel Stevens is going to win, and then you've probably guessed correctly. But anyway, shh. Here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Lisa Snowdon...
Strictly Come Dancing recap time, which makes a change - usually at this time of the morning we're... oh. Not a change at all, actually. There are just three dancers left on Strictly Come Dancing, and it's impossible to guess who'll win at the moment. Unless you guess that Rachel Stevens is going to win, and then you've probably guessed correctly. But anyway, shh. Here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Lisa Snowdon...
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Austin Healey Bombs Out
It's a measure of how close this series of Strictly Come Dancing is that one of the front-runners can't even make the semi-final. And by that we mean that Austin Healey was eliminated from the show last night. And, obviously, when we say that Austin Healey was a Strictly Come Dancing front-runner, we mean that he's clearly completely in love with himself, the puffed-up little rugby twerp. So, Austin Healey is out of Strictly Come Dancing, but why? Well, here's his recap...
It's a measure of how close this series of Strictly Come Dancing is that one of the front-runners can't even make the semi-final. And by that we mean that Austin Healey was eliminated from the show last night. And, obviously, when we say that Austin Healey was a Strictly Come Dancing front-runner, we mean that he's clearly completely in love with himself, the puffed-up little rugby twerp. So, Austin Healey is out of Strictly Come Dancing, but why? Well, here's his recap...
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Tom Chambers
The last Strictly Come Dancing recap of the week! How utterly miserable for you all. But don't be miserable, because Strictly Come Dancing still has an hour and a half of screentime to fill up on Saturday, and there are only four dancers left. You know what that means? Twelve dances each and training montages that last until everyone wants to kill themselves. Hooray! Here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Tom Chambers...
The last Strictly Come Dancing recap of the week! How utterly miserable for you all. But don't be miserable, because Strictly Come Dancing still has an hour and a half of screentime to fill up on Saturday, and there are only four dancers left. You know what that means? Twelve dances each and training montages that last until everyone wants to kill themselves. Hooray! Here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Tom Chambers...
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Austin Healey
Time for some more Strictly Come Dancing recaps, so hold onto your hat. No, literally, hold onto it. OK, go and get a hat and then hold onto it. Back? Good. We're so excited about Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing, because the standard of competition is now so high. Honestly, if we didn't know that Lisa Snowdon will get voted off on Sunday, the tension would be killing us. But until then, here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Austin Healey...
Time for some more Strictly Come Dancing recaps, so hold onto your hat. No, literally, hold onto it. OK, go and get a hat and then hold onto it. Back? Good. We're so excited about Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing, because the standard of competition is now so high. Honestly, if we didn't know that Lisa Snowdon will get voted off on Sunday, the tension would be killing us. But until then, here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Austin Healey...
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Lisa Snowdon
Strictly Come Dancing recaps! Come on, not many left. That has to be a good thing, right? Actually, we've noticed a horrifying trend in this year's Strictly Come Dancing. John Sergeant left Strictly Come Dancing and he released a Christmas single. Christine Bleakley left Strictly Come Dancing and she released a Christmas single. So here's the plan - let's make Rachel Stevens win Strictly Come Dancing, because the last thing we need is any more hapless wailing coming out of her gob. OK? Good. Then here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Lisa Snowdon...
Strictly Come Dancing recaps! Come on, not many left. That has to be a good thing, right? Actually, we've noticed a horrifying trend in this year's Strictly Come Dancing. John Sergeant left Strictly Come Dancing and he released a Christmas single. Christine Bleakley left Strictly Come Dancing and she released a Christmas single. So here's the plan - let's make Rachel Stevens win Strictly Come Dancing, because the last thing we need is any more hapless wailing coming out of her gob. OK? Good. Then here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Lisa Snowdon...
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Christine Bleakley Mooches Off
Strictly Come Dancing is going down to the wire now, and only the best dancers can survive. Christine Bleakley, for those of you who have joined the party late, wasn't one of the best dancers. Some will blame Christine's lack of technical ability for her Strictly Come Dancing exit last night. Some will blame the frightening Meatloaf haircut she sported during her first dance of the night. Us? We're pinning Christine's failure solely on the fact that she hired Felicity Kendal as an acting coach this week. Felicity blinking Kendal. Oh, if only her dances were about short muddy women from the 1970s, yesterday's result could have been so very different. But still, Christine Bleakley is out of Strictly Come Dancing, so who'll win? Here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Rachel Stevens...
Strictly Come Dancing is going down to the wire now, and only the best dancers can survive. Christine Bleakley, for those of you who have joined the party late, wasn't one of the best dancers. Some will blame Christine's lack of technical ability for her Strictly Come Dancing exit last night. Some will blame the frightening Meatloaf haircut she sported during her first dance of the night. Us? We're pinning Christine's failure solely on the fact that she hired Felicity Kendal as an acting coach this week. Felicity blinking Kendal. Oh, if only her dances were about short muddy women from the 1970s, yesterday's result could have been so very different. But still, Christine Bleakley is out of Strictly Come Dancing, so who'll win? Here's the Strictly Come Dancing recap for Rachel Stevens...
Strictly Come Dancing Recap: Rachel Stevens & Austin Healey
Time for our last Strictly Come Dancing recap of the week. But don't be sad - we'll be back again. And again. And again. Like a recurring nightmare in many ways. This Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing is going to be one of the hardest-fought yet, and we can't wait. Mainly it's because Lisa Snowdon will probably get voted into the dance-off again and she'll cry, and we get off on watching broken women. Seriously. We do. We're not joking. We actually do. Anyway, here are the Strictly Come Dancing recaps for Rachel Stevens and Austin Healey...
Time for our last Strictly Come Dancing recap of the week. But don't be sad - we'll be back again. And again. And again. Like a recurring nightmare in many ways. This Saturday's Strictly Come Dancing is going to be one of the hardest-fought yet, and we can't wait. Mainly it's because Lisa Snowdon will probably get voted into the dance-off again and she'll cry, and we get off on watching broken women. Seriously. We do. We're not joking. We actually do. Anyway, here are the Strictly Come Dancing recaps for Rachel Stevens and Austin Healey...
