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CD Review: The Long Blondes, Someone To Drive You Home

by Stuart Heritage

Hype’s a bastards sometimes – you can never live up to it. Pretty much everything we’ve ever looked forward to has disappointed us; Be Here Now, The Phantom Menace, any international football competition that England takes part in.

A year ago we were sent a painfully hip compilation album that sounded as if it was entirely created by a squad of self-regarding Nathan Barleys who somehow managed to turn on the ‘electroclash’ preset button on their Bontempi synthesisers despite their heads being firmly lodged up their arseholes – except one song; Giddy Stratospheres by The Long Blondes. Since then we’ve been anticipating the debut album by The Long Blondes with a sort of terrified excitement; obviously we wanted to hear more but surely – surely – they wouldn’t be able to live up to the hype or be able to reach the same heights as Giddy Stratospheres. Well, Someone To Drive You Home – the long-awaited album by The Long Blondes is out on Monday and it’s full of songs that blow Giddy Stratospheres clean out of the water. Excited yet?

Hype's a bastards sometimes - you can never live up to it. Pretty much everything we've ever looked forward to has disappointed us; Be Here Now, The Phantom Menace, any international football competition that England takes part in. A year ago we were sent a painfully hip compilation album that sounded as if it was entirely created by a squad of self-regarding Nathan Barleys who somehow managed to turn on the 'electroclash' preset button on their Bontempi synthesisers despite their heads being firmly lodged up their arseholes - except one song; Giddy Stratospheres by The Long Blondes. Since then we've been anticipating the debut album by The Long Blondes with a sort of terrified excitement; obviously we wanted to hear more but surely - surely - they wouldn't be able to live up to the hype or be able to reach the same heights as Giddy Stratospheres. Well, Someone To Drive You Home - the long-awaited album by The Long Blondes is out on Monday and it's full of songs that blow Giddy Stratospheres clean out of the water. Excited yet?
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CD Review: Cherrystones, Word

by Stuart Heritage

Chances are that if you head down to HMV and browse through the ‘Compilations’ section you’ll be battered about the head with a £3.99 12CD Ibiza Anthems box set or brain-numbing twaddle like Housework Music. Housework Music. For fuck’s sake.

Compilation albums shouldn’t be like that. Instead of forcing you to wear out the ‘skip’ button on your CD player, they should pick you up and slap you in the mouth over and over again with songs you’ve never heard but can’t imagine being without after hearing them for the first time. Gareth ‘Cherrystones’ Goddard is well aware of this, and his new Cherrystones Word compilation does exactly that. As far as getting your lost psych garage proto-punk kicks go, Cherrystones Word is hands down the best compilation album released this year.

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hecklergigs, Lily Allen, Newcastle Uni, 22/10

by Matthew Laidlow

Usually when we go to gigs and review them we like to give a good detailed account of what happened, so you can get a pretty good feel about the event. However, just this once we’re going to bypass all that and just sum up the entire Lily Allen live experience in one word:

Shit.

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CD Review: New Rhodes, Songs From The Lodge

by Stuart Heritage

Someone needs to teach New Rhodes some fucking manners.

As if loading up the review copies of new album Songs From The Lodge with so much encryption that our computers seize up the instant we try to play it on them wasn’t bad enough, New Rhodes then hilariously leave the first 30 seconds of Songs From The Lodge opener You’ve Given Me Something That I Can’t Give Back silent so that we a) turn the volume up as loud as we can and b) lean in really close straining our ears so that when the song eventually does burst screaming from the speakers we almost fall backwards off our chairs in shock. So New Rhodes unanimously deserve a slap for making listening to Songs From The Lodge an uphill struggle to start with, but what about the actual music itself?

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Hecklergigs – New Order @ Newcastle Carling Academy 11/10/06

by Matthew Laidlow

Old men and rock is a lethal combination like mixing together water and electricity or women and technology. Most of the time, while the old folks are obliviously rocking out, a gang of ASBO-ridden kids will try to slip in and attempt to listen to their hardcore gangsta rap.

Usually, anyone over the age of 40 who decides to perform in front of a crowd are semi-drunk club singers or Phil Collins. But no! Tonight is a different story – we are witnessing a bunch of merry old men who have been rocking out across the world during the eighties, nineties and the noughties. They’re pretty much the only respectable of blokes over the age of 40 who still produce decent music. It’s New Order.

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Free New Crap: Popp & Co. by Dýrđin

by Stuart Heritage

Downloading music is a minefield, isn’t it? If you don’t want to spend 79p per song on iTunes, you have to enter the murky world of illegal downloads where you run the risk of downloading a three second loop of a 1986 Cliff Richard song by accident.

That’s where Free New Crap steps in; each week we give you a song to download that’s a) free, b) legal and – for one week only – c) Icelandic as a bastard. Let us introduce you to Popp & Co. by DýrÄ‘in. Iceland is typically known for making music that either sounds like two glaciers scraping together (hello Sigur Ros) or a mental witch making music with only her throat (howdy Bjork). But Popp & Co by DýrÄ‘in is different because the female-fronted DýrÄ‘in seem to have a bit of a love affair going on with the ramalama sound of Phil Spector producing The Ramones. An Icelandic Puffy AmiYumi is as close to a comparison as we’re probably going to get.

Popp & Co. is one such sugary blast and – even though we haven’t got a clue what DýrÄ‘in are going on about – it’s stayed in our head like a tenacious earworm for days. DýrÄ‘in are also currently touring America, which is deeply unfair because we’d quite like them to come here, too.

Download Popp & Co. by Dýrđin now

Or buy the album at iTunes Music Store

Downloading music is a minefield, isn't it? If you don't want to spend 79p per song on iTunes, you have to enter the murky world of illegal downloads where you run the risk of downloading a three second loop of a 1986 Cliff Richard song by accident. That's where Free New Crap steps in; each week we give you a song to download that's a) free, b) legal and - for one week only - c) Icelandic as a bastard. Let us introduce you to Popp & Co. by Dýrđin. Iceland is typically known for making music that either sounds like two glaciers scraping together (hello Sigur Ros) or a mental witch making music with only her throat (howdy Bjork). But Popp & Co by Dýrđin is different because the female-fronted Dýrđin seem to have a bit of a love affair going on with the ramalama sound of Phil Spector producing The Ramones. An Icelandic Puffy AmiYumi is as close to a comparison as we're probably going to get. Popp & Co. is one such sugary blast and - even though we haven't got a clue what Dýrđin are going on about - it's stayed in our head like a tenacious earworm for days. Dýrđin are also currently touring America, which is deeply unfair because we'd quite like them to come here, too. Download Popp & Co. by Dýrđin now Or buy the album at iTunes Music Store
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CD Review: Souls She Said, As Templar Nites

by Stuart Heritage

If someone handed you a CD and told you it was made by an offshoot of frightening rawk beasts The Icarus Line, what would you expect it to sound like? Like the sort of thing the CIA plays a terrorists to make them confess their crimes, probably.

And you’d be wrong, because that Icarus Line offshoot is As Templar Nites by Souls She Said, and – thankfully – it’s a whistlestop, nine-track, 25-minute tour of the most scuzzily exciting places in danceable vaguely art rock indie around. And that means As Templar Nites by Souls She Said sounds like every band you’ve ever liked, you lucky beggars.

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CD Review: The Blood Arm, Lie Lover Lie

by Stuart Heritage

Hey there, every other indie band in the world. Listen, we need to talk. We had a good old crack at things, didn’t we? Gave it our best shot. Look, we’re just going to come out and say it – we’ve met someone new. You probably haven’t heard of them – they’re called The Blood Arm.

We didn’t mean to cheat on you; it’s just that, you know, you’re kind of dull. And you could probably do with washing a bit more regularly. The Blood Arm, though, they know how to treat us right. We just met The Blood Arm, listened to their new album Lie Lover Lie and we couldn’t help but realise that its just much more sexy, confident, funny and exciting than you are. So, every other indie band in the world, it’s over. We’re with Lie Lover Lie by The Blood Arm now, and – although it’s early days – we think it might be love.

Hey there, every other indie band in the world. Listen, we need to talk. We had a good old crack at things, didn't we? Gave it our best shot. Look, we're just going to come out and say it - we've met someone new. You probably haven't heard of them - they're called The Blood Arm. We didn't mean to cheat on you; it's just that, you know, you're kind of dull. And you could probably do with washing a bit more regularly. The Blood Arm, though, they know how to treat us right. We just met The Blood Arm, listened to their new album Lie Lover Lie and we couldn't help but realise that its just much more sexy, confident, funny and exciting than you are. So, every other indie band in the world, it's over. We're with Lie Lover Lie by The Blood Arm now, and - although it's early days - we think it might be love.
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Free New Crap: Chips – Chicken – Banana Split By Jo-Jo And The Fugitives

by Stuart Heritage

It’s October now, traditionally the month of putting on a woolly jumper, sitting round a campfire drinking hot chocolate and enjoying the beauty of autumn. Only, no. It’s even more sodding summery than August was.

Free New Crap knows this, and Free New Crap will reflect this by giving you to download – legally and for free – one of the most bonkers soul/reggae songs we’ve ever heard: Chips – Chicken – Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives. As is becoming tediously familiar, we don’t know the first thing about Jo-Jo And The Fugitives, bar the fact that – since Chips – Chicken – Banana Split comes from an album called Jamaica To Toronto: Soul Funk & Reggae 1967-1974 – Jo-Jo And The Fugitives were a Jamaican band who lived in Toronto somewhere around 1967-1974.

But the fact we don’t know much about Jo-Jo And The Fugitives shouldn’t put you off downloading Chips – Chicken – Banana Split, because Chips – Chicken – Banana Split is awesome; imagine Toots Hibbert fronting The JB’s and you’re halfway there. Chips – Chicken – Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives has got the fattest breakbeat you’ll hear all week, punchy brass, the most furious organ in the history of recorded sound and a lyric that sounds like a man ordering lunch at a Little Chef. Chips – Chicken – Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives will hit you like an injection of Red Bull, and – even better than that – it’s yours for free. You’re welcome.

Download Chips – Chicken – Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives

Buy at iTunes Music Store

It's October now, traditionally the month of putting on a woolly jumper, sitting round a campfire drinking hot chocolate and enjoying the beauty of autumn. Only, no. It's even more sodding summery than August was. Free New Crap knows this, and Free New Crap will reflect this by giving you to download - legally and for free - one of the most bonkers soul/reggae songs we've ever heard: Chips - Chicken - Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives. As is becoming tediously familiar, we don't know the first thing about Jo-Jo And The Fugitives, bar the fact that - since Chips - Chicken - Banana Split comes from an album called Jamaica To Toronto: Soul Funk & Reggae 1967-1974 - Jo-Jo And The Fugitives were a Jamaican band who lived in Toronto somewhere around 1967-1974. But the fact we don't know much about Jo-Jo And The Fugitives shouldn't put you off downloading Chips - Chicken - Banana Split, because Chips - Chicken - Banana Split is awesome; imagine Toots Hibbert fronting The JB's and you're halfway there. Chips - Chicken - Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives has got the fattest breakbeat you'll hear all week, punchy brass, the most furious organ in the history of recorded sound and a lyric that sounds like a man ordering lunch at a Little Chef. Chips - Chicken - Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives will hit you like an injection of Red Bull, and - even better than that - it's yours for free. You're welcome. Download Chips - Chicken - Banana Split by Jo-Jo And The Fugitives Buy at iTunes Music Store
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CD Review: Kathryn Williams, Leave To Remain

by Stuart Heritage

Not so long ago, Kathryn Williams was nominated for the Mercury Music Prize with her album Little Black Numbers. But a few years have passed since then, and Kathryn Williams has made Leave To Remain – an album that surpasses Little Black Numbers for sheer aching loveliness in every possible way imaginable.

Leave To Remain by Kathryn Williams is an album that drips with restrained autumnal beauty, from the songwriting to the production to the crystal whisper of Kathryn Williams herself. We’re loopy about Leave To Remain by Kathryn Williams, can you tell?

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