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Whitney Houston’s Daughter Is ‘Incestuous’ With Her Brother

by Mof Gimmers

There was always going to be something of a media circus after Whitney Houston died. All eyes were on Bobby Brown because… well… he’s barking mad and volatile. He was odds-on to be the biggest, most public wreck of them all.

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Blue Ivy Carter Wears Some Clothes, World Goes Mental

by Matthew Laidlow

Clothes, they’re important aren’t they? We wear them to primarily keep us warm, though there are people who’ll pay over the odds for the same white t-shirt, just because they’ve got a fancy designer label stitched in. But whatever the cost, they all come in handy, especially if hot chip fat is destined towards scalding our genitals.

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Mad Men’s Jon Hamm Acts Like A Wimp After Slagging Kim Kardashian

by Mof Gimmers

Remember Jon Hamm calling Kim Kardashian names? He basically said that she, along with Paris Hilton, was stupid. She didn’t like it and took to Twitter to underline how successful she is and everyone only ended up thinking of Christina Hendricks’ boobs anyway.

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Susanna Reid’s Breasts Are Evil

by Kris Silver

Ladies and Gentlemen, there is one rule that is to be strictly adhered to by the breakfast news watching masses. Susanna Reid’s breasts are not to be criticised, for they have done nothing wrong. Reid has recently been criticised for showing too much cleavage whilst presenting flagship morning show, BBC Breakfast. Many an hour has [...]

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Malawi Now Thoroughly Sick Of Madonna

by Mof Gimmers

Now that Jesus, Lady Diana and Mother Teresa are all dead (yes, yes, they still live on in our hearts), a variety of celebrities have tried to step up to the plate and save the world from itself. How incredibly noble and altruistic of them.

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Demi Moore Still Obviously Insane: She Wants Ashton Kutcher Back

by Mof Gimmers

If you’ve been keeping an eye on Demi Moore, then you’ll agree that she’s looked pretty unhinged since Bruce Willis left her engineering miracle of an arse. Dead behind the eyes, motionless face and of course, willingly humping Ashton Kutcher.

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Lindsay Lohan: Hit And Run, Police Involvement And Hurray She’s Back!

by Mof Gimmers

Jewel thief. Drunk. Druggie. Violent. Broken. Ankle tagged. Rehabber. Oh, and actress. Lindsay Lohan has had a colourful life hasn’t she? Then, she looked like she was going to straighten-up and go all Christian.

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Boards Of Canada Say They’re Making A New Album In As Few Words As Possible

by Mof Gimmers

Hey geeds! You like Boards of Canada right? You can’t ever adequately tell anyone quite why because they’re really samey and much copied and not especially catchy… but… they’re made of magic aren’t they? And they’re all secretive, reclusive and cultish, right?

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The Apprentice Returns With A Cast Of Socially Retarded Business Enthusiasts

by Matthew Laidlow

Think of big businesses and most people will be drawn to images of fat cat bankers rubbing their genitals with £50 notes and generally having a better time than anyone. Hated by society, there is at least one teddy bear like businessmen we all wish was giving us financial advice.

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Joan Collins Wants To Burn Your Jeans

by Mof Gimmers

Joan Collins, a woman who has traded on looking like a glamorous ghost for the past 20 years, not to mention being the campest of all bitchy gay men, is opening her mouth again and spouting advice.

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