From the category archives:

Movie Gossip

Jessica Biel Getting Naked, Which Is Unremarkable For An Actress But You Want To Look All The Same

by Mof Gimmers

Apparently, Jessica Biel was scarred by taking her clothes off in ‘Powder Blue’, a film she’s made that no-one watched. No. She’s not disrobing with a chainsaw you dolt. Her scars are emotional. Emotional scars are the worst ones aren’t they? Mind-scabs are agony. Anyway, despite saying that she found it “brutal” to see images [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

Gay Slurs Won’t Stop Billy Crystal From Taking Eddie Murphy’s Oscar Job

by Mof Gimmers

When you’re in trouble, don’t call Batman, call Billy Crystal. Especially if you’re in need of a host of the Oscars. In fact, specifically if you’re in need of a last minute host for any awards ceremony. That’s because Billy Crystal is pretty much unable to do anything other than be a vaguely charming awards [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

Watch Clips Of The New Muppets Movie & Brighten Your Otherwise Dull Life

by hecklerspray staff

Hecklerspray is known for not really liking anything but when it comes to fuzzy-wuzzy, cuddly, comedic characters- we’re all over it. So you can imagine our delight when we realised that the new Muppets film draws ever closer. The Muppets is going to be wonderful. Even if it’s the worst film ever made by human [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

Boring Robert Pattinson Is Worried His Rubbish Career Will Be Over When Awful Twilight Ends

by Mof Gimmers

Robert Pattinson is crashingly dull. He’s so dull that rain water has been known to hurl itself into furnaces in a bid to escape his terrific tedium. Rumour has it that R-Pattz is so boring that his blood clots into scabs while still in his veins everytime he wakes. Once, it has been said, Robert [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Human Centipede 2 Takes An Amazing £942 At Box Office

by Mof Gimmers

Ever woke up in the morning and thought to yourself “Hey! You know what I’d like to see today? A fat Northerner stapling someone’s mouth to an anus while jerking himself off with sandpaper!” Have you? Then chances are, you’re Tom Six, the director of The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence), and barely anyone else. [...]

2 comments Read more >>>

Tom Cruise Is Scared Of Singing But Not Of 10,000ft Killer Robots Or Whatever They Have In The New Mission: Impossible

by Michael Park

Professional headcase Tom Cruise has admitted to being terrified of the melodic word with his fear coming to a very public fore while filming his new waste of time “Rock Of Ages”. Tom Cruise is well renowned throughout the world, both as an actor, a producer and as someone who doesn’t know when a franchise [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Dark Knight Rises Videos Of Batman Fighting Bane On Wall Street

by Mof Gimmers

The hype surrounding the new Batman film (Batman 3 or The Dark Knight Rises… it’s up to you what you call it) is getting bigger and bigger, with the entire world stalking its every movement. Seriously. No other film has been as spied on during the shoot like this one has. And there’s more of [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Eddie Murphy Has Been Teetotal For 18 Years (Please Start Drinking Again)

by Mof Gimmers

Have you seen how outrageously great Eddie Murphy was back in his SNL days? Think about those fantastic films he made way back when! Beverley Hills Cop(s), Trading Places, Coming To America, 48hrs… not to mention stand-up films like Raw. He was untouchable for a while. And then he went rubbish. Really, really dreadful. In [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

David Gest Makes Michael Jackson Film (Will Anyone Mention Plastic Surgery?)

by Mof Gimmers

Ever looked at David Gest and wondered if he keeps his face in position with a large bulldog clip like Kent Brockman from The Simpsons? If so, when he takes it off, does his head look like a hot scrotum? Either way, Gest seems like a decent enough bloke for someone who has been ravaged [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Michelle Williams Has Heath Ledger Memorial Hair Which Isn’t Weird At All

by Mof Gimmers

In fairness to Michelle Williams, she really does have a brilliant haircut. However, you don’t want to hear us being nice about a woman’s barnet. You want us to be snarky and nasty. Don’t worry reader, it’s coming. See, as good as Williams’ hairdo is, it’s still weird. Chilling in fact. You see, her hair [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →