From the category archives:

Games

SLACKERJACK: Helmet Bombers

by Stuart Heritage

If you liked Ragdoll Cannon, but were upset that only dolls got hurt instead of actual living human beings, you’ll just love Helmet Bombers. It works in more or less the same way as Ragdoll Cannon – you have to hit a target with a projectile – except with Helmet Bombers the targets are actual [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Blobble Wars

by Stuart Heritage

We can tell that you’re a closet imperialist. Of we course we can. Just look at you. That Napoleon hat you’re wearing sort of gives you away. But still, to satisfy your needs here’s Blobble Wars. It’s a game where you fire balls at things until they change colour and then you win. In many [...]

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SLACKERJACK – VVVVVV

by Mof Gimmers

Space. Exciting place isn’t it? It is full of spaceships! Explosions! Aliens! Lazers! Astronaut corpses floating aimlessly through the vacuum like weird intergalactic driftwood.

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SLACKERJACK – Swordless Ninja

by Mof Gimmers

Ninjas are miles better than pirates. There’s no point arguing about this because it’s a plain as the clothes in your wardrobe. Pirates have missing legs, countless STDs and couldn’t ever hope to creep up on you because they say “ARR” constantly and their parrots would announce their arrival. Ninjas will cut your face off without you even being aware you’d done something wrong. The only hope a pirate has is that you won’t hit them because they are clearly disabled.

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SLACKERJACK: Miami Shark

by Mof Gimmers

Humans are vermin. They burn tyres for fun; drive cars around that pump out evil plumes that choke small woodland creatures until they cry themselves extinct; they puke crude oil into the sea which probably killed The Little Mermaid and Spongebob Squarepants. And now, nature wants some revenge.

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SLACKERJACK: Ricochet Kills 2

by Stuart Heritage

Think of Ricochet 2 as a sort of variation of snooker. It’s much better than that, though, because instead of plotting angles to knock stupid balls into crap holes, you plot angles to shoot men with a big gun. Perfect. Richochet 2 has got a lot going for it – addictive gameplay, perfect sound effects, [...]

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SLACKERJACK: Action Turnip

by Stuart Heritage

Yes, this is a game called Action Turnip. What of it? Oh, shut up. Action Turnip is actually quite wonderful. It’s basically Canabalt – because isn’t everything these days – but better. Action Turnip is better because a) you get to shoot things, b) there are all kinds of bizarre retina-mangling power-ups available and c) [...]

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SLACKERJACK: Inferno

by Stuart Heritage

Firemen are just so heroic and sexy, aren’t they? Not like you, you obese cubicle monkey. God, you make us sick. In fact, Inferno is probably the closest you’ll ever become to being a hero. It’s a fire-fighting simulation game where you have to run around extinguishing several increasingly out of control building fires. Inferno [...]

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SLACKERJACK: Max Damage 2

by Stuart Heritage

Look, you may as well face the fact that you’re going to play Max Damage 2. It’s called Max Damage, for crying out loud. What more could you want? Better yet, Max Damage 2 is all about breaking things with a cannon. Aim your cannon at a telly, and you’ll break the telly. Aim it [...]

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SLACKERJACK: Doodle God

by Stuart Heritage

Doodle God is an interesting game – half Civilisation, half Eyezmaze game, half fuel for your obvious and disgusting messiah complex. You play Doodle God by combining elements to make new elements. So, while you might start off with fire and water and earth and air, mixing them all together might give you thinks like [...]

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