Britney Spears famously has moments of appearing to be a stupefyingly careless mother. In her time she's driven her son around dangerously twice, almost stacked it with him in her arms and took him to hospital with a busted skull.
There was only ever one thing that Britney Spears could do to try and ease her reputation back into some kind of normality, and that's getting a nanny in. And so what if Britney's nanny turns out to be a giant former bouncer and Naval academy graduate with a ferociously bad haircut? The main thing is, there are no cornrows in sight. And – crucially – Britney's nanny hasn't got any plans to release any godawful hip-hop albums in the near future.
Some women find that motherhood comes naturally to them, and that being a mum fills the maternal ache that has lived inside them since they first became a woman. And some women are Britney Spears. Britney Spears hasn't exactly taken to motherhood like a duck to water, more like a duck flying at full-speed into a double-glazed patio window.
You hardly need reminding about the 'incidents' that have occurred between Britney Spears and her young son Sean Preston. The driving with him on her lap, the fractured skull, the semi-apology, the second stupid driving incident, the almost dropping Sean Preston while staggering about in front of a crowd with a drink in her hand… all of which have contributed to Britney Spears hiring a giant imposing male nanny to keep
Britney Spears Sean Preston in check all the time.
Going by the name of Perry Taylor, Britney's nanny is apparently a 28-year-old Naval academy graduate who loves nothing more than pushing Sean Preston's buggy around all the time and making sure Britney doesn't balls things up again. Perry Taylor has been spotted carrying Sean Preston around and nipping out to do the shopping and buy flowers for the family. Despite blatantly doing all of these feminine tasks in front of the paparazzi, the Britney Spears camp is still going out of its way to deny that Perry is a nanny. They prefer the term 'bodyguard' and explain all the sensitive stuff away by saying:
"He's protecting Britney and he's protecting the child."
Regardless of his job title, the benefits of a male nanny for Sean Preston are clear for everyone. Sean Preston gets a solid, stable, comforting male presence to turn him into more of a well-rounded child, Britney Spears gets more time to herself to angrily write loopy poems on her website and Kevin Federline has something else to be pissed off again.
[story by Stuart Heritage]