Without a shadow of a doubt, the two most important things to happen to the planet this year are the American general election and the Sex And The City film.
So imagine – just imagine – what would happen if the general election and the Sex And The City movie hit each other head-on. Imagine the explosion of joy. Scientists would probably bookmark that date as the day when all of Earth's problems were solved forever.
So, people, brace yourself for that exact thing, because it's happened – Sarah Jessica Parker has claimed that her five-year-old son quite likes Barack Obama. And Lego. But mainly Barack Obama. He's harder to ram up your nose than Lego.
The Pennsylvania primaries are just over three weeks away, and they could be the decisive turning point in the battle to become the Democratic candidate for this year's presidential election. It could be the moment when Hillary Clinton defies the odds and takes the lead. She's certainly fought a good fight in the popular culture stakes by imitating Tony Soprano and forcing Jack Nicholson to make a creepy video about her and getting Elton John to sing and stuff.
But now she may as well just go home. There's not a chance in hell that Hillary Clinton can become the Democratic candidate this year. Not when Barack Obama has secured the endorsement of a heavyweight so monumental that all competitions are going to be skewed dramatically in his favour from now on. That's right – Sarah Jessica Parker's five-year-old son supports Barack Obama.
No really, he does. James Wilkie Broderick has unilaterally sided with Barack Obama after studying his plans for social and economic reform, and also because Barack's face is nice and happy like a clown's face. Here's what Sarah Jessica Parker told People:
"He's very into Barack Obama. On his own! He's really, truly into this election. He's come to this conclusion on his own based specifically on Barack's gender. It's that deep. He's a fan and a true supporter of Barack Obama."
It's a good thing, too, because had James Wilkie Broderick decided to support John McCain, Sarah Jessica Parker is on record as saying she'd drown him in a canal. It's on record, but don't try and source the quote. Our word is good enough.
Now, the more cynical of you might look at Sarah Jessica Parker telling anyone that'll listen about her infant son's political endeavours and think that she's just shamelessly whoring out her child to try and drum up a bit of hype for this summer's Sex And The City movie. And that might be the case. But the important thing is that you can't let Sarah Jessica Parker know you're onto her.
Because, honestly, if plan B involves Sarah Jessica Parker releasing a set of Kristin Davis-style naked photos, then we're all done for. And, really, what's a few months of mildly nauseating baby-talk compared to permanently-damaged retinas?
Read more:
Sarah Jessica Parker's 5-Year-Old Son Supports Barack Obama – People