Brad Pitt doesn’t have many requirements when choosing security – it’s nice if they’re physically intimidating and it helps if they know who Brad Pitt is.
Because if they don’t, there’s quite a big chance that something weird will happen. Something like the events of Monday night, in fact, when – at a preview of his new film The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button – Brad Pitt was grabbed and shoved around by a security guard who mistook him for a photographer.
Although manhandling the star you’ve been hired to protect at his own movie preview in a venue covered with several giant posters of his face might seem like the mother of all etiquette violations, we can’t really blame the security guard here. After all, Brad Pitt had grown a moustache for the preview, and therefore the guard probably thought he was being bumrushed by Private Walker out of Dad’s Army.
Brad Pitt’s security guards are famous for their hands-on approach of protecting their employer. it doesn’t matter where in the world he is, if anyone tries to get too close to Brad Pitt chances are they’ll end up beaten up or choked by a couple of men who look like King Kong with alopecia.
That’s OK, though, because – with the exception of a couple of unfortunate Indians – most of the people on the receiving end of a beating from Brad Pitt’s guards have been paparazzi or reporters and, as we all know, those people are literally worse than murderers.
But when Brad Pitt’s guards start beating up Brad Pitt? In front of the paparazzi? Yeah, that’s not so clever. So it’s a shame that that’s exactly what happened at a screening of The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button in Los Angeles on Monday night.
According to reports, Brad Pitt was grabbed, pushed and spun around by a security guard in plain clothes as he tried to enter his own screening. But it’s sort of OK, because Brad Pitt has managed to blame the paparazzi for it, which is good because they’re all literally made of slime and hate humanity. Brad told People:
“Though they were exceptionally more aggressive than usual,” Pitt describes the paparazzi to PEOPLE, “breaking through a security barrier and into a private holding area, ultimately [it was] just another day in the life…”
It hasn’t been a good week for Brad Pitt all in all. First his ex-wife decides to start ragging on his new girlfriend in public and now this? It’s almost as if there’s a conspiracy out against him at the moment.
Of course, there isn’t. The guard just thought he was doing his job by grabbing Brad Pitt, and that’s all there is to it. Unless the bodyguards of the world have all decided to rise up and revolt against their masters Terminator-style, that is. Which, you know, they should.
The Dread Pirate Sausage! says
“After all, Brad Pitt had grown a moustache for the preview, and therefore the guard probably thought he was being bumrushed by Private Walker out of Dad’s Army.”
God bless you, Mr. Heritage.
And I mean that.
Oh, I’m dying. Maybe it wasn’t all that funny and I’ve just got a serious case of The Giggles™. But I know I just spat on myself.