So far this awards season, it looks like Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt might come away lighter than expected.
Angelina Jolie’s Changeling role has consistently lost in all the big awards, while Brad Pitt’s Oscar nomination for The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button probably won’t come to much. But Brad and Angelina don’t care about anything as ephemeral as awards, because they’ve got something deeper.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have each other. And they said that so many times on the red carpet last night that we’re surprised they weren’t carried into the auditorium on a tsunami of vomit.
The SAG awards aren’t just about Slumdog Millionaire and the continued inexplicable adoration of Sean Penn, you know. They also allow a perfect opportunity for actors to schmooze around with other actors and heap insincere praise on one another while secretly hoping that all their peers catch a serious, face-deforming disease that ruins their career forever.
And this chronic actorly bumlicking is unbearable when strictly limited to a professional basis, so imagine how much worse it is when the actors are also having sex with each other. Actually, no, don’t imagine that at all, because Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are here to give you a precise demonstration of exactly how sickening it can be when two copulating actors decide to big each other up in front of others.
Those of a sensitive disposition shouldn’t read the next paragraph, courtesy of AP:
“He’s a wonderful man,” [Angelina] told E! “The person I admire the most in the world… We’ve been doing it together for four years – it’s always nice,” said the star who received a SAG Best Actress nomination for her role in Changeling. “I don’t think I’d want to be doing it alone. It’s nice to be doing it with your best friend, and have a laugh in the middle of the show.”
OK, OK, we get it. You’re in love. Jesus. Don’t you think we picked that up last time you gushed to a magazine about it? Or the time before that? Goodness, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, you’ve been together for four years now – can’t you do an interview about how annoying it is when Brad Pitt leaves his socks in the bathroom, or how Angelina Jolie often wakes you up in the night by farting? Surely you row about toenail clipping, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Surely!
Alright, look, we’re sorry. Brad, Angelina, we’re not mad at you. You’re a happy couple – at least in public – and that’s something you should be proud of. We’re just nervous, you know? Because we know how this game works – first you publicly declare your love for one another and then Jennifer Aniston has to go one better and hand-carve a 120ft marble shrine to John Mayer in her front garden that she has to gnash and wail in front of 14 times a day. And we really haven’t got the energy to write about that.
Lisa says
Just wondering if you watched this interview. Angelina and then later Brad obviously did NOT want to talk about each other or their personal lives but the reporter pushed it.
ava says
They’ve been doing it together for 4 years now?
Hmmm…..Brad didn’t get divorced until 10/05…..math is not your friend Angie.
nana says
LADY AVA, why are you so angry at Angelina? seems you know everything about their personal lives.
Beatrix says
Lisa is right. Why don’t those interviewers ask the actors about the roles they’re nominated for? Instead, AJ was asked “How has Brad changed you as a woman?” Good Grief! The look on her (AJs) face said it all. Then she asked Brad the same question about AJ! He was more straightforward and said it wasn’t the time for that sort of question, but the interviewer persisted! Brad saw Micky Rourke, made an exuse and fled the interview, leaving the interviewer looking dejected. I guess that was her idea of an insightful question. Pitiful.
janet says
my only comment to the writer of this article is this: you are a very unhappy person.
Julian Mentat says
I don’t understand. If they went into the building by the back door, they’d avoid all those stupid questions, wouldn’t they? I mean, to walk along a red carpet kind of makes you more noticeable.
david says
I don’t get the criticism. It’s not like they’re volunteering info about their love life. Every time they’ve said something about their partner, it’s because they’ve been asked. In fact, I don’t think E! asked them about anything else except each other.
EMMY says
There is a pervasive lack of professionalism running through our society which we just accept as normal. Why else would an interviewer standing outside an award ceremony invade the privacy of the nominated actors with such intrusive questions? She probably did nothing to prepare which would have been the proper thing to do and equipped her with an intelligent question germain to the movie/evening. I saw the interview in question. I had been looking forward to the broadcast up until that point. It is no wonder some of these exchanges end in violence.
Angela50 says
Stuart if you’re so fed up of them then why the hell do you still speak about it. Find another couple to talk about. Illuminate us with your knowledge!!! You know whats funny? You interviers and journalists can’t really stand the Brange but you never stop talking about them. LOL
Angela50 says
I meant interviewers. I could not stand you make a remark on my spelling!! LOL
Angela50 says
Another idiot on line??? perfect for soap opera. WTF cares how long it is they are together. Maybe maths is not her friend but you’re too interested in Brads life not to be a anistun fannny. LOL