Dear Dennis,

Last week me and my boyfriend Dave were out drinking with his best mate, Rob. We all had way too much to drink and Dave and me ended up getting into a blazing row, with him storming off.

I was really mad and determined that he wasn’t going to spoil my fun as usual, and Rob was up for staying out for a few more. We had a great time talking about Dave and all his shortcomings, it really was the best night out I’d had out in months.

I didn’t really think about it, but I guess me and Rob were flirting a little – after all, he’s a very good-looking guy. He walked me home and I invited him in for a coffee.

Dave was passed out, snoring on the sofa when we got in, so we sat in the kitchen, chatting. One thing lead to another and soon we were making passionate love on top of Dave’s sleeping body.

Now I can’t stop thinking about that stolen night of passion with Rob. I haven’t told Dave but I think he can tell that things aren’t the same. What should I do?

Shelley, Preston

Dear Shelley,

Clive James there proving the old adage that a cock-up in the hand is worth two in the bush. This next bunch of calamitous clunkers, horrendous howlers and blatant blunders prove that you should never work with children or animals – or actors!