Put yourself in the shoes of Boy George. You're arrested in your apartment for apparently having bags of cocaine everywhere, and you face 15 years in jail. Somehow the court lets you off and just gives you some easy community service to do.
That's a good thing, isn't it? Instead of spending 15 years eating grey mush in close proximity to dozens of murderers and rapists, you're just told to go and rake up some leaves for a few days. You'd be grateful, wouldn't you? Not if you're Boy George, you're not. Boy George has reportedly skipped doing his community service, annoying a judge so much that he's warned Boy George he has to complete five days of scrubbing about by the end of August or he'll be banged up.
Boy George is a busy man. He spends upwards of nine hours a day thinking up camp, waspish putdowns for any possible line of questioning, plus before he goes out anywhere he has to colour in the underside of his jaw black to make him look black, and then find a funny hat that matches. And that takes time – so much time that Boy George hasn't got round to doing the community service that he was ordered to do back in March.
You'll remember, of course, that Boy George was arrested last year after he called the police to report a burglary at his New York apartment, when the police found 13 bags of cocaine lying around. After several delays, Boy George finally made it to court, where – possibly to save face – he avoided jail by agreeing to take part in a plea deal whereby Boy George admitted wasting police time so that the drugs possession charge would be dropped. The sentence? Five days of doing a weeny bit of community service. That's a walk in the park – literally.
But Boy George? Picking up leaves in a park? That's so not him – he'd much rather spend time making a new musical up all about his life or doing cameos in The A Team. And this failure to carry out his community service has landed Boy George back in court – if he doesn't complete the service by August 28th, it'll be the slammer for Georgey Boy. Judge Anthony Ferrara told Boy George:
"This is a simple matter of five days of community service. It's up to you as to whether it will be an exercise in humiliation or an exercise in humility. Your choice. I'm going to make you a promise: if you do the community service you go through that door [the exit]. But if you don't do it you go through that door [the jail entrance]. You must bring your toothbrush. I'm not going to give you another chance."
So now Boy George will have to complete the service just like any other shmoe. His lawyer Louis Freeman said:
"It's probably raking leaves in Central Park or something like that. He's ready to do it."
Boy George had originally wanted to give a concert as his community service, but that idea was turned down by the judge. Partly because Boy George hasn't really been properly famous for 20 years, and partly because Judge Anthony Ferrara always preferred Limahl. Or something.
Read more:
Jail Warning For Boy George – This Is London
[story by Stuart Heritage]