If the Black Eyed Peas brand of dreadful music wasn’t bad enough, they’re going to infect your games console by making a game for you to get furious with, leaving you kicking your controllers out of the window and throttling yourself with the plug flex.
That’s right! will.i.am, Fergie and the other two who don’t seem to do much will be prancing around in a game… but what will it be like?
Well, rumour has it that it’ll be one of those dreary things where you dance and singalonga to the monstrous hits they’ve made. However, if the developers are reading this, they should hear our ideas first because they’re miles better and guaranteed to make they game sell roughly a million less copies.
BEP have teamed up with Ubisoft, whose created the popular Just Dance software. They’re now going to make The Black Eyed Peas Experience on Nintendo Wii, Xbox 360 and ZX Spectrum 48k
Ubisoft head Yves Guillemot says:
“The Black Eyed Peas are a worldwide phenomenon and Ubisoft is the worldwide leader in dance games – together we are going to make The Black Eyed Peas Experience a game that fans around the world will love”.
Fergie adds:
“It’s a perfect fit for us. The Black Eyed Peas are bringing the party to the people”
That’s all well and good, but wouldn’t it be better if a game was created on Fergie’s bladder called ‘Correct Yoself Before You We Yoself’ where players are encouraged to warble hysterically while soiling themselves? The grace in which you deal with public urination will get you points, with bonuses being offered for little accidental poos that you do.
Or perhaps there could be a Streets Of Rage style game where the four Peas roam the streets with pipes and knives… however, the object is to get your arse handed to you as comprehensively as possible. That would be easy enough with the one with the stupid name who is going blind.
Maybe, finally, there could be a game created by Ubisoft that is an original idea that has no awful celebrity tie-in? How about that?
Follow hecklerspray on Twitter or join our Facebook group or BUY ONE OF OUR STUPID T-SHIRTS!
JoeMomma says
They could of rehashed the old Atari 2600 classic Journey Escape, where you had to guide each of the band members to their ship, avoiding groupies and record execs.
Cookie Monster says
I’m going to go with a Grand Theft Auto format where Fergie attempts to take-over the meth business one giant dose at a time. Winning the game means using your now toothless, 85-pound, and heavily scarred Fergie to slay the current meth boss, Banshee MacGuffin (rendered to slightly resemble a certain Brit train-wreck of singer) an her sub-boss Dieter Poherty. Of course, the final battle is a sing-and-dance competition that looks and sounds like sweet poetic beauty to the competitors, but lays waste to all those who witness it, and the cities in which it takes place (New York and London, of course). Just imagine Fergie standing atop that gerkin of a building, flinging physical insult, in the form of wailing and bony hip flailing, at Dieter Poherty, whilst the building wilts and falls into a pile of dust.
Obviously, they’re going to need RockStar. Ubisoft can’t pull this off.