Stop the clocks. Cut off the telephone. Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone.

Deep down, we at hecklerspray knew this day would inevitably have to come at some point but we tried to tell ourselves otherwise. We lied to ourselves to stop the hurt. But now there’s so much hurt it’s coming out of our ears and dripping onto the floor. Mrs. Hecklerspray will need to get the hoover out.

Are you sitting down? Please sit. Take a deep breath before continuing.

Liz Hurley is giving up acting.

It’s alright. Let it out. This is no time to be a man. Let those tears fall. This is a sad day for all of us. It’s like August 1997 all over again. From Metro:

“Filming is very hard with a child, and I found I wasn't able to be a good mum and do movies,” she said. “I decided I couldn't really do movies any more, which was a huge decision because I love making movies.”

And we loved watching you in them, Liz. Really we did. From Permanent Midnight to Serving Sara, everything you touched seemed to turn to straight-to-DVD gold.  

Liz, by the way, hasn’t made a film since 2004’s Method. We just assumed she was taking a break from acting and were waiting with baited breath for her return to the bargain bucket bin at Blockbuster. Now the worst has been confirmed a little bit of us has gone away, never to return.

Farewell to thee, Liz. You shall be missed. But we will never forget. Never forget.

Surely someone must have set up a help line by now? We’ll keep you updated on that front but until then hecklerspray is going to curl up in a ball and watch 2002’s Bad Boy on repeat until our eyes bleed.

Read more:

Liz Hurley Quits Acting – Metro

[story by Callum de Caestecker]