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Later on today, Big Brother will announce the latest housemates who face eviction. It’s just a shame they’re not all going to be evicted immediately.
Maybe it’s us, but the remaining Big Brother housemates make us want to break our televisions into pieces with our heads. Not a single one of them has anything even vaguely resembling a redeeming feature. It’s like standing outside the chimp cage at the zoo. And at least if you taunt chimps enough, they’ll inevitably fling handfuls of their own poo at you. The Big Brother lot don’t even do anything as entertaining as that.
So why are we still watching it? Because there’s money to be made. There are still six housemates that we can still bet on. And if you play your cards right, they can still make you rich.
So who will be evicted on Friday? Here are the latest 10th eviction odds, from hecklerspray and Betfair.com…
Anthony – He’s almost a certainty to win Big Brother, so he’s highly
unlikely to go on Friday. It’s a shame, because he’s possibly the
thickest housemate ever to have set foot in the house. He forgot to
order toilet roll for the housemates and couldn’t spell the word
‘waffle’ on the shopping list. You can actually hear his brain make
chugging noises when he thinks. Current odds – 45/1
Kinga – Someone, somewhere has told Kinga she can sing. They were
lying. And now we have to listen to her belting out godawful showtunes
at the top of her manky lungs all the pissing time. She’s already got
her flabby norks out and snogged the boys in the pool. And she’s
committed the mortal sin of describing herself as "mad", something that
only personality-free idiots do. But if she can stop just one housemate
from nominating her, she’ll be immune from eviction this week. and
she’s getting chummy with Derek… Current odds – 24/2
Eugene – What exactly does Eugene do? He counts when Derek puts his
head under water. And that’s it. That’s genuinely all he does. He’s
pointless, but the most harmless of all the housemates. Current odds – 35/2
Makosi – Despite crying all the time and carrying a dead poodle
around on her head, Makosi has regained her mental balance in the last few
weeks. We were starting to warm to her again. But then she let Craig
suck her nipples in the swimming pool and we went off her again.
Current odds – 32/5
Derek – This is why Derek needs to go. After somehow guessing that
Big Brother was thinking of Silver the horse, he went on to ask the
following quiz question: "What was the name of John Wayne’s famous
horse?" – even though none of John Wayne’s horses were ever famous. And
then went on to reveal in the most sneering way possible that Wayne and the
horse starred together in a film called Hey Ho. Which doesn’t exist.
He’s a fool and we can’t wait to see the back of him. And just because Kinga can’t sing, he doesn’t have to join in with her. Current odds – 7/3
Craig – Craig is one of the most odious fools in the history of
television. After his creepy way of ‘comforting’ Anthony when he was
too drunk to remember anything, and then denying it the next morning,
he’s gone on to show what a twerp he really is. He’s dangerously
self-absorbed, and bursts into tears at the drop of a hat. Hopefully
he’ll be evicted soon, he’s doing our heads in. Current odds – 20/21
We’ll find out who is up for eviction at around 5.30pm. Remember that the odds will drop sharply once the housemates have been revealed. Get to Betfair and start betting before then to get a much better deal. Good luck.
Join our Big Brother Betting Club – email bigbrotherbetclub@gmail.com.
Related stories:
The hecklerspray Betfair.com Tutorial
[story by Stuart Heritage]
