There’s a saying round our way that goes “Urgh, put ‘em away luv. They’re all manky and greasy and stuff.”

And that saying couldn’t be more apt when it comes to discussing Rebecca, the Big Brother housemate who was evicted on Friday night. She came, she saw, she kept getting her knockers out and she had a drunken tongue-wrestle with a twig. We won’t see Rebecca’s like again, unless of course we go to any pikey nightclub on a Saturday night. Honestly, they’re full of them.

But with Rebecca gone, who’s going to win Big Brother? Here are the Big Brother betting odds for Mohamed, Sara, Maysoon and Lisa, with help from Paddy Power…

Mohamed - Finally. It’s taken over 50 days but we’ve finally realised why most of the Big Brother housemates have found the energy to round on such a steaming nonentity as Mohamed. After several hours of high-level scientific exploration into the issue, we’ve realised that Mohamed just has one of those faces. It’s the way he moves his mouth when he talks, the hint of slimy creepiness in his eyes, the way he’s constantly on the prowl for a cigarette to steal. It’s icky and it creeps us out. Also, Mohamed won’t win Big Brother because he shoved his tongue into Rebecca’s gob last week; and finding her attractive is a crime punishable only by being catapulted into the side of a cliff at a million miles an hour. Fact. Current Big Brother betting odds - 80/1

Sara - Another week in the Big Brother house, another display of absolutely piss-all from Sara - the girl with the face of Angelina Jolie and the personality of some especially uninteresting vapour. Right now Sara might be developing a bit of a crush on Darnell. She might not be - every time Sara is shown on Big Brother we start smashing ourselves about the face with a tin tray because we’ve discovered it’s less painful and pointless than paying attention to her - but let’s just say she is. Fingers crossed that their kids have her looks and his personality. They’d still be bullied at school, but - let’s face it - rather that than the other way around. Current Big Brother betting odds - 66/1

Maysoon - Much has been made of Maysoon’s developing personality - all of a sudden she’s actually started to engage the Big Brother housemates in conversation, rather than just sit around sucking her cheeks in and blankly staring into the middle-distance all day. We’re not convinced, though. Look - who’s the biggest personality in the Big Brother house at the moment? Lisa? Big whoop - she’s basically a transvestite with the voice of a Chuckle Brother. The Big Brother producers know that there’s nobody interesting left in the show, which is why they’re blindly flailing around trying to find something, anything, to fill their daily hour with. And apparently the occasional mutterings of a hopelessly dull deodorant model do that quite well. They don’t - it’s not an exaggeration to say that we’d rather dive into a quarry full of dirty heroin needles than listen to Maysoon talk about anything. Ever. Current Big Brother betting odds - 40/1

Lisa - So, without Mario in the Big Brother house to constantly dominate her, what’s Lisa like as a person? Fucking awful, in a word. As well as having a face that looks like a permanently blind child’s Crayola scrawl of a pretty lady, Lisa’s also taken it upon herself to round on Rachel and Kat as often as possible. God knows why - being mean to Rachel is a bit like shooting a puppy in the face. And another thing - Lisa’s one of those awful arseholes who think they’re far more deep than they actually are, as seen during her bewildering discussion with Darnell about how you should never abuse the sea. Physically abuse the sea. With your fists. For some reason, Lisa’s never been put up for Big Brother eviction. This must either be because the Big Brother housemates are stupid or because they’re vainly hoping that next week’s task involves turning the Diary Room into a lethal injection chamber. We know which of these options is true, but we know which one we want to be true, too. Current Big Brother betting odds - 25/1

Tomorrow: Big Brother betting odds for Stuart, Rachel, Mikey and Rex. But if that’s too long to wait - or you feel like making more money than you know what to do with - head right over to Paddy Power to see the full list of Big Brother betting odds.