Last week's Big Brother was very possibly the worst in history. Watching a bunch of hungry hot fools doing nothing at all isn't anything close to fun, and to make up for things, Big Brother is pulling out all the stops this week.
Already on Big Brother this week we've seen the best piece of television possibly in our entire lifetime, when Imogen tried to sing a song about how much she loves Susie, only to end up making a completely abstract noise like two cats having a punch up down a megaphone… and there's more to come. Hopefully this week the Big Brother jail – the Big Brother house next door, painted grey – will be unveiled, and there's going to be a double eviction on Friday, too, with either Imogen and Susie, Spiral and Michael or Richard and Pete up for Big Brother eviction on Friday. Fantastic, isn't it? Like make-up sex after a week of bored arguments with Big Brother. Not make-up sex with any of the Big Brother housemates, though, they're all still a bit rubbish.
But the question remains – who'll win Big Brother? Here are the Big Brother betting odds for Richard, Spiral, Mikey and Aisleyne, with betting odds from PaddyPower.com…
Richard – We're not sure why Richard ever bothers unpacking his suitcase – he's up for Big Brother eviction every single week, and he always manages to survive. Richard's luck won't last forever – eventually he'll face Big Brother eviction against someone who isn't a ghastly caricature, and he'll be out on his big bald sanctimonious ear. But while Richard's still in the Big Brother house, he may as well do something useful, like pretend to come on to Spiral until Spiral literally explodes with rage. Current Big Brother betting odds – 40/1
Spiral - It's strange how people's perception of someone can vary so wildly, isn't it? Look at Spiral – a growing consensus says that Spiral is a stand-up chap who's not afraid to fight for what he believes in. Which is funny, because he looks very much to us like a proper fucking nutter. In the Big Brother house, Spiral has managed to furiously lose his temper after even the smallest provocation. Watching Glyn drink some liquidised lamb, watching Michael flick some chickpeas at Richard, having any semblance of a conversation with Jennie – give Spiral an inch and he'll run around the living room frothing with mental anger for a day. And happy Spiral is even worse – happy Spiral rubs his genitals up screaming girls for kicks. Spiral, in short, is awful. Current Big Brother betting odds – 25/1
Mikey – Mikey has reverted to form over the last few days on Big Brother. After a few weeks of, you know, actually doing stuff and using full sentences instead of vaguely Scouse grunting, Mikey seems to have wilted in the heat and fallen back on his old ways. He's not pulled any straining faces with Jayne balancing on his shoulders, he hasn't helped out any puking teenagers, and he hasn't even had the energy to flirt with Imogen with any real conviction. We watched Mikey exercise for 25 minutes at the weekend, and we swear he didn't change his blank expression once. Is Mikey pulling his weight in the Big Brother house? We'd say not. Current Big Brother betting odds – 16/1
Aisleyne – We'd imagine that the Big Brother casting process goes something like this: anyone who's borderline mentally ill is allowed to go into the Big Brother house, while anyone who's actually dangerously unstable just gets an invite to join the Big Brother eviction mob instead. Thanks to a handful of squawking eviction mob pikeys who chanted "Aisleyne out!" on Friday, Aisleyne is now spending the bulk of her time crying and wailing and quivering as if she'd been told that her family had all died of the plague. The last time this happened was with Grace, who had a full-on breakdown inside the Big Brother house afterwards. Will we see a repeat? Let's hope so. Current Big Brother betting odds – 16/1
Tomorrow – more Big Brother betting odds! But until then, don't forget to check out the latest Big Brother betting odds, from any number of these brilliant betting websites. Good luck!
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[story by Stuart Heritage]
