I’m afraid for poor, old blind Scot Mikey!
Seriously, how the hell’s he going to survive in the Big Brother house without his trusty guide dog Mario? Surely he’s gonna be crashing round the place, banging into things and crying a lot?
Mario, of course, is up for eviction – and Paddy Power have him at 2/1 and their second favourite to get the chop after Steph, his fake wife. So it seems Mario’s carefully thought out strategy of leading the blind guy around hasn’t had the effect he so desired. It hasn’t made him look like Mr Caring at all. Just a bit of a cock.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more blindingly obvious and see-through ploy to win votes. The Sun, bless their corporate socks, called “Beefcake” Mario, a “big bully” yesterday, while I prefer “twat”.
And since he has been able to pair himself up with the ‘lovely’ (man-like) Lisa – after his fake wedding to Steph – it has confirmed just how vile he is. How vile they are, in fact.
“Ohhh, I love Mikey and that’ll do me fine… I’m out of here”. Okay, not a direct Mario quote, but it was something like that, just a little more creepy. Lisa – nod, nod.
The fake wedding was a genius move by BB. It was a brilliant way to set up two of the most easiest-to-take-the-piss-out-of oddballs in the house.
When Steph is almost in tears because her shades are broke, it’s hard to be sympathetic. A direct quote: “We’ll I’m not going to bed, I want them fixed…”
“D’you not understand, they’re broken on the hinge, they need properly fixing.” Get a life.
Sorry, I digress… I will tackle Steph tomorrow.
At Paddy Power she is the favourite to go at 4-9, with Mario 2/1, Lisa 9-1 and chirpy northerner Luke the outsider (not the first time he’s felt like that, I’m sure) at 33/1.
Today is Mario (Shaun, as he was christened) and right now, I want to whisper into Mikey’s ear: “Be careful, there’s a lot of chairs and tables in there.”
Otherwise, I can see the furniture crashing around him and everyone else in the house completely ignoring the blind bloke.
Oh, until they realise he has a chance of winning and become guide dogs too of course…
Story by Richard Hughes
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Brilliant article!
Come on you must be joking you want to evict a entertaining person, and what leave mario and lisa in the house to chat about mikey all the time. Mikey can get buy with other people MARIO OUT MAN!
Arr why did the caring Mario leave poor blind Mikey on the settee and retired to bed what about health and safety shame on you Mario ‘Mikey could have slipped on your oil slick yuk! And thank god Steph has a back bone if it wasnt for her standing up to Alex bully i dread to think what might have happened to Becks, i was horrified to watch Alex again pick on another helpless housemate and big brother again do nothing. ‘Well done Steff for speaking up’ ‘it’s more then i can say for Mario and Luigi who said they were keeping out of it’ ‘keeping out of what?’ any decent person would and should have aided that girl in her hour of need, but then again how many came to her rescue two and look what happened on the stag night in the bathroom when Alex for the second time viciously attacked Mikey and Mario sliiid awaaay. I think Mario and Luigi should be out they are using Mikey as a prop if Mario really cared for Mikey he would ever have built him up and asked him to be best man at a fake wedding their was plenty of other male house mates to choose from so why do it? Mario and Luigi speak with their eyes and body language and Mikey is not able to pick this up’what do they bring to the house? ‘i don’t want to a pair of old farts getting smoochy, greasing each other up, then cos their so boring and nowt to talk about lets rip in to Steph. I don’t believe winning immunity at the wedding was the only reason they wanted Steff to act out the relationship i think it was for their own benefit and Steff sensed this and felt uncomftable i think they are a pair of swinger’s who supposedly met through an eBay purchase ‘would you meet some one in a pub car park to collect items bought on eBay? i post mine or collect from homes ‘not car parks isent that where swingers meet?.
tl;dr. Where are these carparks? How does one approach said deviants? Eh? Eh?