Beckham Is The Worst Dressed Man In All The World
Today the bottom must have dropped out of David Beckham’s world.
It doesn’t matter that he’s not the inspirational football player he once was, or that his marriage is still plagued with infidelity claims. He doesn’t care. But there, is far, far worse to come.
hecklerspray is very sorry to have to break the news that he has been voted the worst dressed man in Britian.
According to GQ magazine, this year’s best dressed male is Rio Ferdinand. "He is a clotheshorse in the best sense of the word and has great dress sense", according to the judges. And we’ll take their word for it.
Coming second is Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho, for his ’sober’ grey raincoat – possibly the only item in his entire wardrobe.
Other winners included Jude Law, Clive Owen, Pete Doherty and Daniel Craig, who might be the new James Bond.
Daniel Craig, that is, not Pete Doherty. Although it’d be patently
brilliant to have Junkie Pete as 007, wouldn’t it? Anyone? No? Just us,
then.
Remarkably, the biggest loser of the night was Beckham – more used
to winning these awards – who was savaged by the judges. He was called "The original fashion victim" by Manolo Blahnik, a man who spends all day designing shoes. Shoes! And still has enough time to judge how well people are dressed.
Beckham’s style was dismissed as being "nouveau riche", and more accurately "chav". To add insult to, well, more insult, he’s also been dropped from the new US Pepsi commercial, replaced by enormo-chinned relic Kirk Douglas, father of staple-faced actor Michael.
Also on the losers list were the perennial favourites (Jonathan Ross, Jeremy Clarkson, John McCririck), ‘Nazi’ Prince Harry and ‘Sort Of Jungle Lion Thing’ Prince William; and Simon Cowell, who is probably not starting a new series called Pope Idol to find John Paul II’s replacement. Even though it’d be a great idea.
Some people have suggested that a ‘best-dressed’ award is unsuitable for the dark times we live in today. hecklerspray just thinks they’re jealous because they’ve got crap shoes.
[story by Stuart Heritage]
How can anyone take GQ magazine seriously when they once put Brooklyn Beckham in the top20 “best dressed man” list. And, for the life of christ, how can Rio Ferdinand be possibly lauded as “best dressed”, while Beckham gets all the negative “chav” references.
Has the world gone into irony over-drive?
Perhaps GQ’s readership is down, it must be nothing more than a publicity stunt. Or perhaps Mr Beckham refused to do a GQ shoot recently. They have an obvious agenda against him. David Walliams – talk about pot calling the kettle black, how convenient he gets included in the “best dressed” list for his dubious style, and also mouthes off about Beckham. I would hasten to guess which of the two David’s will be still in the limelight this time next year, and I don’t think it’ll be the Little Britain oD’er.
Beckham is simply on the wrong side of the media at the moment, they have deep agendas against him, ever since he signed for Real Madrid.
The infidelity allegations – media induced
The football form ramblings – media induced
His fashion style – media induced
The “affair” allegations have always been dismised, his on pitch form is not as bad as people say, he has scored in 2 of the last 3 England World Cup qualifiers for peats sake, and he has been injured a lot during the season. And his fashion style is purely subjective, but the GQ poll was clearly a figment of the editors imagination. Publicity stunt.