Feel free to get back in the ocean. Feel free to swim within a half hour of eating, or go into the water with bleeding open wounds. Strip off your life vests and cast them to the salty wind, because Baywatch is back!

Maybe. It all depends on whether David Hasselhoff can get it off the ground. Somewhere a hardcore fan is getting the nervous shakes wondering if the sacred memory of his once mighty Baywatch may be defiled, fearing the eleven wonderful seasons it’s already aired may have tapped it of all it’s good ideas. Fear not noted fan, because ‘hoff has some ideas to really shake things up!

Baywatch (DVDs), the television series most noted for launching the careers of such Hollywood heavyweights as Pamela Anderson, Pam Anderson and Pamela Anderson-Lee,
ain’t done. It may thrust it’s eroded decomposed hand right out of
it’s watery grave with grasping fingers and implied rage, just like Skeletor’s hand at the end of that not awesome-enough He-Man movie from 1987.

There was a time when Baywatch was toted as "The most-watched
television programme in the world," and it’s chief man-star seems to miss
the notoriety. David Hasselhoff wants the glory back, plus he’s single again,
how’s a guy supposed to pick up chicks if he’s not gainfully employed? He knows just the formula to regain that "most-watched" crown, too.  He
splurbed this about the show’s new theme:

“They’ll be lifeguards who are also sent on crime-busting sprees.”

"Also, they’ll have energy efficient jet packs for scooting to and fro."

hecklerspray made up that second quote.

Hasselhoff is currently scouting locations, and he’s narrowed the list to three: Paris, New York or Miami.
The change of scenery is also intended to breath new life into the
show, but did it work when they all moved to Hawaii for the 2000-2001
season? 

No, it didn’t. Mathematically speaking, 2000-2001 equals exactly
one year, and Baywatch’s last year at that  Plus, in Paris they’d all
have to work in a hotel pool, as the Eiffel tower never has, nor ever
will be anywhere near beach-infused water. At least according to
Google’s image search, anyway.  Sure, Paris has rivers, like the Seine
and the Congo, but the Seine isn’t lifeguard friendly, and the Congo is
actually in Africa.

Relax Hasselhoff, the new Baywatch will work, but only with
our help. hecklerspray spent the majority of yesterday’s legitimate
work day coming up with awesomeness for you to mentally imbibe, here’s
the creme of the crop:

What about a hybrid between Knight Rider and Baywatch?
Hasselhoff could comb the beach straddling a black boogie board with an
robot brain and a cylon eye. That way you guys could save floundering
swimmers and litigiously solve underwater fish murders. Here’s a hint: it’s always the French guy!

Read more:

David Hasselhoff planning to resurrect Baywatch! – WebIndia

[story by Shawn Lindseth]