Nope. Absolutely not. There is no way the good people of hecklerspray would ever take drugs from you… weren’t you in a boy band once?

Les McKeown may not be a household name these days. That is, unless you happen to be a police officer or a 57-year-old housewife getting absolutely dripping wet in bed at the thought of men running around in half mast trousers and tartan scarves.

You see, Les McKeown was once in the grotesquely popular Bay City
Rollers. Leslie sang lead for the tartan-clad roughnecks, and idiotic
girls would throw themselves underneath buses when dreaming of the Shang-A-Lang hit makers. However, McKeown’s imperial days are over,
and sadly he can no longer walk on water, or indeed, out run the long
armpit of the law. Les, apparently, is a drug dealer. Or so the courts
tell us – Les denies this. But naturally, it would be churlish of hecklerspray to poke fun at
Leslie in this awful, awful time.

The hilariously haggard coke fiend Les McKeown and his Bay City Roller (CDs) pals Patrick
McGlynn and Alistair Murray are also in hot water over cocaine related
gubbins. Les is accused of setting up a meeting in May 2005, between
McGlynn, Murray and another chap called Tony Burt, to buy £16,000 worth
of what is known as Amphetemoidle Moronic Idiotica – cocaine to you or me – with the aim of
selling it on. Rumours that the sales would go to infants and their
moist-knickered mothers could not be denied or confirmed at the time of
press.

The murky story centres around the sale a car. The car was said to
contain £16,000 in cold cash, the drugs and a CD with a line of coke on
it. Monsieur McKeown is said to have hoovered the line in a bid to
‘cheer himself up’. Naturally, the red eyed celeb stated that he didn’t have a habit, but does
use it “maybe two or three times a year." Whether Leslie was referring
to fly years isn’t yet clear either.

This isn’t the first time the Rollers have been caught-up with naughty
bits. The majestically named Derek Longmuir, a sometime hospital worker,
was severely slapped for having pictures of filthy kids stored on his PC. Former
Rollers manager Tom Paton was jailed for three years in 1982 after admitting
sexually abusing teenage boys at his home just outside of Edinburgh.

Bloody dirty lot.

Fear not you morons. hecklerspray will be outside the courthouse in a
bid to secure the Bay City Rollers’ freedom. In fact, we have placards
left over from our stint outside the Michael Jackson case. Let’s just
hope, gawp, snigger and pray that we’re not singing Bye-Bye Baby in a
few weeks time.

The trial continues.

Read more:

Bay City Rollers lead singer set up £50,000 cocaine deal, court told  – Guardian

[story by Mof Gimmers]