Sometimes advertisements can be genuinely surreal.

Take the new Cravendale milk campaign, for example – a series of sketches featuring a footballer, a pirate and a cow getting into all sorts of downright baffling scrapes. Still, at least everyone knows what milk actually does. Imagine a campaign that told you virtually nothing about the product.

Just take a look at HeadOn.

American readers may think we're being a little slow on the uptake here (yeah, yeah, but we bet that Cravendale reference had you stumped, didn't it? And if we even so much as uttered "Charley says never talk to strangers," betcha you wouldn't have a pissing clue what we were waffling about).

HeadOn, you see, has developed a cult following for being the most vague and annoying commerical on US television. Just check out the number of spoofs on YouTube – but not before you've treated yourself to the brief and frankly Orwellian original.

Basically, we reckon – through evaluation of the product graphic – that HeadOn is some sort of marvellous headache-soothing stick-thing. Why are we left guessing? Because all that we're eerily instructed to do is "apply directly to the forehead."

Over and over again.

Christ. For all we know HeadOn could be a tagging system put into implementation by the New World Order. Which – while admittedly quite unsettling – still wouldn't be as painful as those nasty tattoo barcodes, would it?