Awesome or Off-Putting is a weekly delve into cryptozoology, ufology, aliens, medical marvels, scientific wonders, secret societies, government conspiracies, cults, ghosts, EVPs, ancient artifacts, strange facts, odd sightings or just the plain unexplainable.

Israel’s got a lot on its plate right now – what with all this talk of nuking Iran, nuking Syria, nuking Lebanon and the constant need to police the wailing wall for people who are clapping too vigorously. Seriously – it all adds up. The last thing they need right now is multiple eye-witnesses claiming an actual mermaid is haunting their shores.

But that’s what they got anyway.

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What children need when coming into this world is stability, warmth, and most importantly, a great big butt to spill out of when the doctor comes a’callin’.

After all, the the more exit room the less likely the baby is to realise that that’s exactly what a fart must feel like. In a world where children’s fart sympathy is starting to cause so much unrest, we really can’t stress big-birthing-butt importance enough.

Speaking of which – a Kardashian is stuffed with child, and we don’t mean their mother again!

Michael Jackson’s dead, and there’s nothing any of us can do about it. Sure, you could moonwalk circles around what will probably be his Lincoln Monument-esque tomb, but all that’s gonna get you is a really large dead ring of grass.

The more ardent of his fans – the ones that whited out Peter, James & John from their New Testements and added in Michael, MJ & Jacko – well their religious adoration of him may not be the first. That’s right – it seems the Egyptians may have worshipped his likeness thousands of years ago.

So says a crazy looking statue,…

Awesome or Off-Putting is a weekly delve into cryptozoology, ufology, aliens, medical marvels, scientific wonders, secret societies, government conspiracies, cults, ghosts, EVPs, ancient artifacts, strange facts, odd sightings or just the plain unexplainable.

When a tin foil spaceship crashed all over Roswell, New Mexico, the residents there must have been overcome with anticipation of the tourist dollars that would soon stuff their wallets. As Roswell sat back and watched the green fly in (pun intended), Aurora, Texas must have felt slighted.

After all, they had a spaceship crash like 50 years previously – and theirs included a now-buried little green body.

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Remember when K-Fed had a dancer’s body? Sure it was covered in bad tattoos, cornrows made without the aid of a mirror and a layer of congealed body grease, but still – it was a dancer’s body.

And he used that body to scoop up Britney Spears and steal her away to a life most view as exotic fantasy and wonder.

Well he’s not scooping things up with that body any more. Except burritos, corn chips, and maybe an entire half-pig flame-broiled and basted.

What we’re getting at here is the man has gained weight – and boy has he!

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Good news if you’re the kind of person who still likes Madonna! Somebody’s now selling a 4″ x 6″ square of her skin stretched over a small wooden frame. We’ve heard there are several moles vaguely formed in the shape of the big dipper, and if you follow the image, navigationally speaking, you’ll eventually wind up in the Americas.

We’ve also heard it originally came detached in the teeth of a rabid goat seven hours into a Kabbalah desert-tent ceremony.

That, or bunches of faxed love notes and boring telephone messages she delivered years ago are going up for auction.

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Awesome or Off-Putting is a weekly delve into cryptozoology, ufology, aliens, medical marvels, scientific wonders, secret societies, government conspiracies, cults, ghosts, EVPs, ancient artifacts, strange facts, odd sightings or just the plain unexplainable.

As the story goes, Mr & Mrs Thomas Otto were cruel to their servants. As an act of quiet revenge, one of these servants made a voodoo-cursed doll and gave it to their son Robert Eugene. The doll was made in the boy’s likeness – and was even given his name – Robert.

According to stories, perhaps the name Chucky would have been a better fit.

Awesome or Off-Putting is a weekly delve into cryptozoology, ufology, aliens, medical marvels, scientific wonders, secret societies, government conspiracies, cults, ghosts, EVPs, ancient artifacts, strange facts, odd sightings or just the plain unexplainable.

When we think of hauntings there are two images that usually come to mind. The first is of a semi-transparent Bill Cosby from Ghost Dad trying to convince you yet again that Pudding Pops are delicious. Terrifying, right?

The second, from now on, is of a spectre picking up a 13-year-old boy and dragging him physically through his house – like what happened in this case…

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