That Michael Jackson, what a character. He barely went five minutes without getting into some sort of hilarious situation.

If he wasn’t buying all sorts of ridiculous crap that he couldn’t afford, he was probably skidding around in monkey poo. People complain when we call him Wacko Jacko, but how could you not?

One thing that really did make Michael less wacky was his relationship with children. There’s just something a little bit weird about a grown man who shares his bed with kids, no matter how innocently it’s done. But Michael Jackson is dead now, so that will no longer…

Certain cities have various scenes that have been established over time. For bands that get involved, it’s all fine and dandy for them.

Look no further than Oasis and The Smiths from Manchester who set the bar for others to follow. But then again, not everyone wants to crank out indie music which continually sounds stale after every release. Still, a solid fan base will lap it up.

Other towns may not have such a strong musical heritage, but they put their stamp on where there from. Leicester, for example, may not be bursting with quality artists apart from breakaway act Kasabian – but…

Jesus, we know when we’re being outdone. Most of the time, it’s when an unborn Japanese child severely beats us on FIFA. And we don’t mean by using the hand of God in extra time.

And then there’s Morrissey. Somehow, Morrissey is classed as a genius despite still singing songs that an old band of his wrote years ago and releasing solo albums that are properly gash.

Recently, Morrissey has had a bit of problems on the gig scene. He passed out in Swindon and then got twatted in the face with a cup in Liverpool. Surely it’s full steam ahead…

In every episode of EastEnders, you can be guaranteed of a few things. For a start, you’ll never sit through the full 30 minutes without hearing an ear-piercing screech or cackle.

Peggy’s bra will have pinged off and blinded a child like in her Carry On days and then she’ll slop a warm pint all over Pat, causing fisticuffs at the bar.

There’s also the iconic music that accompanies the programme. Without those drum beats at the beginning and end of the show, EastEnders wouldn’t have any charm left at all. Kind of like the service in Ian Beale’s café. But things are…

With 2009 kicking and screaming to a close, many magazines and other publications often spit out their best-of lists.

Usually it’s the opinion of one person sat in an office. Most of the time, people with any sense flick past them as they don’t need someone else telling them what is considered to be good.

Though we could use the arse end of 2009 to go over the artists we’ve looked at, we won’t. Instead, we’ll still try to at least bring you something creatively different and worth investing in. This week, we couldn’t pick a better artist for mixing things up than Bibio. Whilst we don’t know if it’s pronounced Bi-bio or Bib-io, the records released by him are bloody fantastic.

Parents, we all have them. And we all have memories of them.

From the time you crapped yourself in a busy shopping centre to when your father started using swearwords in full conversation. Face it, we’ve all been there. Well that’s unless you’re a weird test-tube child and you were grown for scientific amusement.

Sadly, not all relationships between parents and their offspring can go smoothly. There can be a variety of reasons of this. In the case of Michael Jackson he objected to his dad Joe Jackson whipping the stuffing out of him. But time heals all and love conquers emotions. Or,…

Everyone knows Morrissey. He’s that loveable vegan from Manchester who complains about everything and then goes in to a big vegetable huff when things go pear-shaped.

Only a couple of weeks ago, he collapsed at a gig in Swindon. Perhaps he saw what the people there looked like and wanted out. Pronto.

In the latest shenanigan involving the former Smiths front man, he got pelted with a plastic cup of water in Liverpool. Now he didn’t fall over, his feeble vegan body did manage to withstand the force of the close range throw. Still, he did get soaked worse than a…

Yee-haw kids, its reality pop star season, so what does that mean?

It means that anyone who’s got an ounce of talent in their blood is going to get ignored. Money-making mass-produced rubbish will take over and make us all believe it’s the best thing since the last reality show winner from the previous month.

So can we suggest someone to you? Take a listen to Chicago’s One Little Plane. With an album out last year, she has been pretty much unnoticed by everyone, but has enough support to carry her through. Produced by folktronica man Four Tet, these beautifully crafted…