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Ian Dransfield

Tom Cruise Weathers Tropic(al) Thunder to Walk Katie Holmes to Work. Or Something.

by Ian Dransfield

It would appear that Katie Holmes didn’t manage to run away from Tom Cruise as fast as we would have hoped for the poor girl. She did manage to escape to the other side of the US ‘to be in a Broadway show’, as the official story put it – we know that was just [...]

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Big Brother Betting Odds – Nicole Out Tomorrow, Please. We’re Not Joking.

by Ian Dransfield

It’s every woman for herself in the Big Brother house this week with outsiders Nicole and Sara up against one of the front-runners Lisa. There’s no Kat fight and welsh teacher Rachel has survived Lisa‘s scornful looks for another week – but for the other three, it’s claws out, let the bitch fest begin. So [...]

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Lily Allen Delivers Street Justice on Video. Also: Swears a Lot.

by Ian Dransfield

Lily Allen – she’s that one who had pink hair, a godawful TV show and is generally a waste of space. Yeah, that sounds about right. Well now it would seem she’s got herself into MMA – that’s mixed martial arts – with some hardcore street fighting action. Well, hardcore may be a bit far, [...]

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Britney Spears Never Learns Vol. 15: A Return to Reality TV

by Ian Dransfield

Why can’t Britney Spears just decide whether or not she’s actually getting better? There’s no punchline to that, by the way, it’s just a question. Maybe it’s because of her ridiculous legal fees, or maybe it has any other real reason behind it, but Britney Spears is reportedly in talks for another reality show for [...]

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Watchmen Won’t be Watched by Men, if Fox Get Their Way

by Ian Dransfield

Everybody seems to be getting in on the comic book-to-movie adaptation thing, with easily one of the most anticipated being that of Watchmen. While normally this would be greeted with trepidation and a slight amount of fear, the sheer quality of the source material, combined with the fact that the film is supposed to actually [...]

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Michael Phelps May Cure Lindsay Lohan of Being Boring

by Ian Dransfield

Lindsay Lohan may be back on track towards becoming entertaining again, thanks in no small part to Olympic gold medal-machine Michael Phelps. The girl that could well be a lesbian, who may well be having a wedding to Samantha Ronson, who used to get off her face on all manner of things all the time [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Dad ‘n’ Me

by Ian Dransfield

Bullying is a serious issue, and it’s never funny. Well, apart from the times when it’s funny. But it’s certainly never fun. Well – again, it is. Sometimes. But still, shut up. Anyway, it’s more fun now, with Dad ‘n’ Me coming to waste a bit of your day in fine Slackerjack fashion. A scrolling [...]

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Christina Applegate Makes Cancer Look Like a Boob

by Ian Dransfield

Christina Applegate’s cancer has left the building, along with two old friends. You can call it brave, you can call it smart, but regardless of what words you want to use to describe it, Christina Applegate has kicked the botty of cancer by having her boobs lopped off in a double mastectomy. As selfish as [...]

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Tom Cruise Causes Sleeper Puns to Take Over the Internet. We’re Not Happy.

by Ian Dransfield

Tom Cruise is continuing his run of trying to make people think he’s less of a massive mental, religious freak. First he stopped jumping around like a particularly stupid chimp, he stopped going on about Scientology in public – though he did see some of his private video collection released, much to the delight/terror (delete [...]

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Roseanne Barr Goes a Bit Mad, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Possibly Flee in Terror

by Ian Dransfield

Roseanne Barr isn’t really known for being particularly funny, but this time she’s managed to make us all laugh. See, there are times when celebrities get angry at other celebrities – they usually mean a few cross words and not much else. We smirk at these times. We enjoy. We forget. Then there are times [...]

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