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Paul Gibson

Hecklerspray’s Monday Music Mango: Sonic Youth, Black Eyed Peas, Orbital

by Paul Gibson

Separating the sweet, juicy flesh from the stone and skin of this week’s major label releases. Planes are falling from the skies, the government is shrivelling up like a salted slug, and Brangelina are rumoured to be living separately. All unmistakable signs of an impending Apocalypse. But fear not: hecklerspray presents the music which this [...]

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I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here (USA): The Girls

by Paul Gibson

Day Two of the Costa Rican shenanigans, and we present to you the lady contestants. Oh, and Janice Dickinson, who has been flung into this group in the absence of a ‘Leather Handbag’ team. Second day, and already two people have left the show. Unsurprisingly, and happily, it was the two most irritating and juvenile [...]

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I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here (USA): The Boys

by Paul Gibson

The Americans, having nicked IASGMOOH from us, have failed to understand what makes the thing watchable: instead of cheeky Ant and Dec, they’ve got Myleene Klass hosting. A woman who donates sap, rather than blood. Desperate as we are to witness talentless unknowns humiliate themselves on the telly, we genuinely can’t wait for the news [...]

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Hecklerspray’s Monday Music Mango: Kasabian, Michelle Shocked, Paul Potts

by Paul Gibson

Separating the sweet, juicy flesh from the stone and skin of this week’s major label releases. You’ll have noticed there’s a worldwide financial crisis going on. Well don’t worry, because we’ve generously picked out three of this week’s new music releases to uplift your spirits. Or else confirm your belief that the world is going [...]

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Britain’s Got Talent Final: Diversity Win! Kill Us Now! We Mean It!

by Paul Gibson

It wasn’t supposed to happen this way. The paparazzi were waiting outside ITV with their wide-angle lenses attached, the party in Blackburn’s village hall was ready to go (crisps, pop and some raw horse meat for Susan Boyle to tear into), and a lady who lives with 30 cats in Wisconsin had pre-written a Wikipedia [...]

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Britain’s Got Talent: Mid-Semis Roundup And Sweary Susan Boyle

by Paul Gibson

We’re halfway up the Everest of semi-finals week, and ITV have kindly given us a little sniff from a tank of oxygen, in the form of a day with no show. Caution: metaphor-stretching ahead. Since setting off from auditions basecamp, it’s been a steady slog up the north face of Britain’s Got Talent. The air’s [...]

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Hecklerspray’s Monday Music Mango: Iron Maiden, Marilyn Manson, Folk

by Paul Gibson

Separating the sweet, juicy flesh from the stone and skin of this week’s major label releases. Welcome, hecklerspray devotees – and those unfortunates who have stumbled in while searching for information on New Kids On The Block/menopause symptoms – to a shiny new, weekly look at what aural filth the major record labels are going [...]

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Britain’s Got Talent Pt 2: Through At Last, Through At Last, Susan Boyle Is Through At Last

by Paul Gibson

In many ways, Susan Boyle’s journey on Britain’s Got Talent is much like the history of America’s Civil Rights Movement. Both have shown that it is wrong to judge people based on appearance. Both have proven that the oppressed can, through strength of spirit and unshakable belief in what is right, break down barriers and [...]

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Britain’s Got Talent Pt 1: Britain’s Got 4,000 Urban Dance Groups

by Paul Gibson

Britain’s Got Talent on Saturday began to tell us which 40 acts were to perform again for the public vote. And you’ll never guess which Oprah-loving, Obama-hating, probably metal bar-bending Sottish singer made it. Give yourself ten points and a furtive crotch massage if you guessed Susan Boyle, she of The Voice, The Modesty and [...]

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Sashay Offstage, Barbie: Susan Boyle Doll Has Made You Obsolete

by Paul Gibson

Parents, got a child’s birthday coming up? It’s a girl? She wants  a dolly? Why, a crazy little American lady has the perfect gift. We foresaw many merchandising opportunities for Susan Boyle. The pattern from her audition dress coming to dominate the Indian restaurant wallpaper market, for example. Fancy dress parties everywhere flooded with blokes [...]

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