Ups and downs.

Folded:

• Double firing (Alan Sugar gets turned on and impotently angry at Jim, so sacks Ellie and Vincent to satisfy himself)
• Bridesmaids – out 22nd June (watching a women in a wedding dress suffer diarrhoea is funny. No, it really is)
• Kristen Wiig (see above. Ironic considering the title of the movie, but she is marriage material)
• Brandy Alexander (you’ll look a pleb ordering this in Wetherspoons, so find somewhere without sticky floors and enjoy it in the corner)
• Stuntman Vic Armstrong has written a book about how great he is (scroll down to the Telly Savalas joke. It’s soooooo good)

T-shirts and vests.

Folded:

• Every retro bush edition of Playboy available on iPad (finally a reason to buy the stupid thing: to wank in public)
• A massive archive of cool film posters (should that interest you in the slightest)
• Give to this (Rufus Hound makes sense. For once)
• 11 Twitter tools you didn't know about (though if these excite too much you should probably get out more)
• Ikea show you how to make a lightsaber (cute touch having Obi and Yoda in blue. Aw)

Creased:

• KFC ?So Good? advert (if the food doesn't make you sick, this will)

This week?s successes and soul crushing failures.

Folded:

• Delayed students at airport make human bicycle (beats standing in WH Smith?s reading FHM)
• Why we love Last Exit to Nowhere t-shirts, Star Wars and beverages (this and this now please)
• Kids won't sleep? (tell them where to go)
• All the clips of McBain add up to a full movie! (make this, The Simpsons, make it now!)
• Roseanne Barr (Google her, young people) on the sitcom making experience (brutally honest and fascinating article)

Creased:

• Ken Clarke (pillock or seriously massive pillock?)

Dinner and tea.

Folded:

• This clip of Drive starring Ryan Gosling (not out until September and already we want to watch it yesterday. Best get to Cannes then)
• Talking dog (the old ones still work. Guaranteed to cheer you up)
• Zombie proof house (fun idea. Pity whoever made it is clearly mental)
• Cute cursor (even better when you go outside the window)
• Hollywood families: the stars and the strange ones (diverting)

Creased:

• Sitting down will kill you (everyone in the hecklerspray bedsit is the walking dead)

Tina Turner and Ike Turner.

Folded:

• The Apprentice starts next week! (finally something we can all have an opinion on that doesn't involve a dead terrorist, royal knees-up or election no-one will bother to vote in)
• Mount Gay rum (Bond orders it in Casino Royale so it must be all right)
• House of Love (go Harry, you big fluffy ginger)
• The summer?s big movie posters: honest versions (everyone can use Photoshop, but not as amusingly as this)
• ?Bin Bagged? (trust The Sun to nail it)

Creased:

• Doctor Who (the long honeymoon is over. We’ve gone off this now)

This week?s Kate and Willy.

Folded:

• Sex quiz (worth taking, if just to stretch the comedy penis. Oucher!)
• Two bank holidays in a row! (gawd bless us all)
• The Suspicions of Mr Whicher (something period on ITV without John Suchet? They?ll be bringing a decent Marvel comic book movie out in cinemas next)
• Thor (and to think every single one of us thought it was going to be Branagh flavoured pig swill)
• Bunting (not always ironic. See how far you can push your neighbours)

Creased:

• Royal wedding bedding (oh, the fun you'd have)

Grapes and wrath.

Folded:

• Our on-the-verge-of-being-commited editor making a special cocktail ? and himself sick (all in aid of chasing the coin. More fun than you might think)
• Nicolas Cage is basically his character in Bad Lutienent all the time now (method man)
• Drum kit jeans (Yeah, well what have you done with your life?)
• Why we love comic book nerds (and Stan Lee probably doesn't)
• Movie gifs so good you\’ll shake (simple idea executed with big fat genius)

Creased:

• Easter (congratulations, you can eat chocolate like every other day of your life)

We likey and no lighty.

Folded:

• Wonga voice choir (love how weird these ads are getting)
• Changing James? face (just read the comments)
• Cold sunny days (like the best thing ever. Spring, you're a winner at seasons)
• Train tweeting (stuff how boring it is for your followers, go ahead and complain about the delayed timetable and sandwiches made of Plasticine. It'll shave valuable seconds off your journey between naps)
• McDonalds? Monopoly game (why is this fun? Stickers. Stickers are always fun)

Creased:

• Ray Barone (how did anyone ever build a sitcom around this utter moron?)