Grief? An uneasy feeling that undesirables have been in your home? You’ve been watching The Hills, haven’t you.

Or you’ve been burgled. Basically the effects of either are identical. Just ask Audrina Partridge – she’s in The Hills and now she’s been burgled as well. Plus she has to talk to Spencer Pratt sometimes. Talk about unlucky.

But more fool the burglars, because Audrina Partridge managed to catch them on camera. This basically means that they’ll probably end up with their own MTV reality show. At least they’ve got a talent, which admittedly puts them a nose in front of Audrina.

The Oscars are supposed to be a time of happiness, socio-political grandstanding and photo-realistic fashion imagery. But try telling that to Audrina Partridge from The Hills, who returned from an Oscar party to realise that her house had been burgled.

Wait. Hang on a minute. Audrina Partridge from The Hills was at an Oscar party? That doesn’t make sense. Hopefully it was one of those Oscar parties where everyone sits around eating pizza on the floor of someone’s living room watching TV, and not one of the big, proper Oscar parties that actual celebrities go to. Because that would be ridiculous. New rule: nobody from The Hills should ever attend an Oscar party until the Academy introduces a new Best Mind-Numbingly Repetitive Reality TV Show Starring Nothing But A Pack Of Braying Titholes category.

Anyway, Audrina Partridge did attend an Oscar party and – as if she wasn’t upset enough after being pipped to the post by Heath Ledger in the Best Supporting Actor category – she returned home to discover that she’d been burgled. It’s not known what was taken in the robbery, although we suspect the theives stole some items that can never be replaced, like sentimental heirlooms, those naked pictures of her and the single original thought that has ever passed through Audrina Partridge’s otherwise completely barren mind.

Anyway, Audrina Partridge isn’t just going to give in to the burglars without a fight – her surveillance cameras picked up images of the crooks and she’s blogging her little socks off about it, too:

My house was broken into over the weekend but luckily my surveillance camera caught the burglary on tape. I spent most of the morning filling out police reports and going through the house room by room making lists of everything that had been taken. Most of the items are replaceable, but they took off with a few very sentimental things too. Definitely not a good way to start the week.

To be fair to the police, we heard that there weren’t that many reports to fill in – it’s just that one of them asked for Audrina Partridge’s occupation and she spent three hours nervously trying to work out what she actually does for a living. If you have any information of the whereabouts of Audrina Partridge’s profession, please contact the LAPD. Your call could be important.

Oh, we’re only joking. Being burgled is a horrible thing to go through, and we wish Audrina Partridge all the best. Even if we are utterly convinced that these ’surveillance cameras’ weren’t installed to catch burglars but so that Audrina Partridge can watch her entire day back before bedtime in a desperate attempt to convince herself that she’s more popular than Heidi Montag.

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