Arrested Development Marathons Will Destroy The Second-Quarter Economy


Employers of the world should begin planning now?for the fact that no one will be at work on Monday May 27th due to exhaustion from a collective,?worldwide?all-nighter?on the 25th/26th watching the?hotly anticipated new episodes of Arrested Development.

The entire season is being released?at 12:01am on the 26th ? and, conceivably, the mature among us could wait until a reasonable time on Sunday, perhaps have a post-brunch marathon, and still be at work with bells on Monday morning.

But we all know that won?t happen. Everyone will stay up all night, pass out, wake up, watch more, and call in sick on Monday ? because if you?re old enough to have been a fan of Arrested Development, you?re too old to bounce back that quickly from an all-nighter and too immature to just go to bed. (Trust me on this.)

The simultaneous release of all 15 new episodes of Arrested Development?on NetFlix is sheer genius. After seven years of?deprivation and speculation and anticipation and various?other -ations over whether it would be a movie or?new episodes or happen at all, the world deserves this.

Earlier this week, a short outtake, featuring Lucille and Buster Bluth, was released?and it reminded us what a crazy gem we’ve been missing all these years. In the clip, Lucille?exhales smoke from her cigarette into the mouth of her hook-handed son Buster, who then?blows it?out the balcony dooor. You see, Lucille is under house arrest and can’t get that close to the window (ankle monitors are a bitch), but it’s a non-smoking building … so what else is she to do? The clip is short and not even that terribly funny, but it’s coming … finally … in just one month.