ER, the hospital show that nobody watches any more, has produced some big stars in its time – you know who we’re talking about.

We’re talking about Mekhi Phifer, famous for his tiny bitpart in the Eminem movie 8 Mile. And Noah Wyle, who left ER and found fame as the lead in The Librarian: Quest for the Spear – the only film in history that nobody has ever even considered watching. Oh, and Anthony Edwards.

But although Anthony Edwards left ER six years ago when his character died of brain cancer, the good news is that he’s back! Anthony Edwards is making an impressive return to ER tonight to mark the final season of the show, in an episode we’ll presume is called Why Doesn’t George Clooney Return Our Calls Any More?

People say it was cancer, but we’re not so sure that’s what killed Michael Crichton. We think Michael Crichton died of a broken heart when he heard that his beloved ER was getting cancelled early next year. That’s what killed Michael Crichton. Although, you know, the cancer probably helped as well.

But even though he’s dead, that still doesn’t change the future of ER. Next February will mark ER’s final episode after 15 seasons of untamed success. Or, to be more accurate, four years of untamed success, eight years of people only just remembering that it existed and three years of wanking in the dark.

However, even though ER is on the outs – killed by the success of Grey’s Anatomy, or ER for menstrual women – the show is determined to snuff it with a flourish. That’s why tonight ER welcomes back its biggest star.

Well, OK, not its biggest star. That would be George Clooney. And not its hunkiest star, either. That’d be Goran Visnjic. So let’s just say the bloke who became a star because he hung around ER until everyone else left. We’re talking, of course, about Anthony Edwards.

And, yes, you might think that Anthony Edwards returning to ER six years after his character Dr Mark Greene died of brain cancer sounds slightly incongruous, but it’s OK – rather than taking the obvious option of making it a zombie episode, it’ll all be done in flashback instead. And his fee is going to charity, too. San Jose Mercury News reports:

Edwards didn’t want pay for his guest shot. Instead, Warner Bros. donated $125,000 to the hospital. Steven Spielberg matched that money, and “ER” executive producer John Wells kicked in $50,000. “You’re given a great gift when you have success as an actor,” said Edwards, who is 46. “And the only way to pass it on is if it’s something you genuinely care about.”

It seems to us like everybody wins here. A 250-bed hospital will get built in Africa, Anthony Edwards gets to remember what being on television is like and the smattering of remaining ER fans get to see someone marginally famous help close the show instead of the girl from Bend It Like Beckham who isn’t Keira Knightley and Velma from Scooby Doo: Monsters Unleashed. What more could anyone ask for?

No, not George Clooney. Shut up.

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